Weekly Hints~2006

What if you made the catnap craze a part of your holiday season? We have so much adrenaline flowing during the next few weeks because of the holidays, extended family being around, eating crazy food, doing crazy things and staying up until crazy hours. We might need to add to our list of things to do to get a catnap once in awhile. I call it the catnap craze, because when things are settled down in my life, it is kind of the last thing I would ever think of doing. But, during the next several weeks, it may help you keep going, keep you from getting sick, help you from losing it all together when you become grouchy, and otherwise make it possible for you to cope with having your children home from school, spending the holidays with your in-laws, or even something as simple as having to clean up snow brought indoors after a fun afternoon with the children building a snowman.

When you get tired, too tired to be useful, I encourage you to think about and to work into your schedule a catnap here and there. I remember when my children were younger, I learned to lay down when they napped, even if it was only with a 15-minute timer. When they were older I still went away for my “time alone”. If I would just lay still my body could rest and it was somehow sprung into action for the rest of the day. Or if your mother shows up to help fix dinner, ask if you can steal away to a quiet bedroom and crash for a 20-minute nap. Taking these cat naps will make the holidays much nicer.

And don't forget to relax your schedule just a little bit in the morning if your husband is home, all the kids are home, and everyone sleeping in. Sleep in yourself just a little bit. Everyone knows that a nice wife, a nice mom, a nice aunt and/or a nice grandma is better than anything else during the holiday season. So take care now and during the next two or three weeks remember to catch the catnap craze and get a catnap once in a while so you can keep going past all of the fuss that comes with the unsettled schedule of the holidays.

Catnaps to go along with new presents, strange meals with strange hours always helped me get through a little bit better and I think it'll help you, too, so Merry Christmas and happy catnap craze.

My friends, today we are talking about handling the second week of December in such a way that you, too, can enjoy the holidays. I like to use this phrase: “It is my week to put my regular life away so that I can enjoy the holiday “.

Upstairs in one bedroom I have a partially-finished quilt top. I been working on some family history that is scattered in the basement office. I have mending that is not done, some drawers that I want to line and so I have those supplies purchased. It is time for me to put these half-finished projects completely away. I know that during the rest of this week, all of next week (especially as the children get out of school) and the last week, which I call sandwich week (the days between Christmas and New Year’s), there will be little time for me to work on very much of anything but fixing meals, cleaning up, entertaining and enjoying the children, traveling, and being with friends and family.

If I leave my half-finished projects out, it will dismay me, confused me, and otherwise upset me, and keep me from having a simplified, focused special holiday. So I like to start at the front door, walking around my house counterclockwise direction, putting the quilt top away, cleaning up those different kinds of makeup I was going to try, putting away the drawer liners for another time. I’m not going to get to them before Christmas comes.

So as you function this week, as you work through all of your priorities, just take a few minutes and put the half-finished projects completely way. I usually make little notes in my planner where I have put these projects so during the first week of January, when things settle down a bit, the kids go back to school, and my husband has returned to work, I can return to my regular routine and finish up. Keep periods of time during that first week or so of January without a lot commitments. It takes awhile to ramp up after two or three weeks of having children, husband and other family home.

Take good care this week and remember this phrase as you’re cleaning up, putting away, and putting aside things you haven’t finished: “It is important to put your regular life away so that you, TOO, to can enjoy the holiday.”

I met an angel the other day. At least I think so. She is a woman in my neighborhood that became aware of some specific family needs in another town in the valley and thought she would do something about it this month. The husband has less than adequate employment, the pantry is rather bare, and the holidays look somewhat bleak. She is no different than many others I have met through the years, but I was made glad because her requests helped me let go of things I really don’t need or want, and yet haven’t had the courage to share. (We cling so tightly to our stuff.)

The requests were small: gently-used clothing, unused canned goods, coats that are gathering dust, and toys that are no longer really being used.

As I went through my house, pulling cans from the pantry, finding a pair of shoes that really don’t work for me, and purging the unused games, I felt “cleaned out” and “freshened”. We keep so much we really, really don’t really need, and actually should share, but who will appreciate it enough to make the sharing worthwhile?

May I suggest that you, too, take just a few minutes this week and find the “angel” items in your house. Yes, give, give, give! It won’t cost you a thing, it won’t even dampen your style. In fact, it will help you get organized and ready for the influx of gifts which are surely to come your way soon.

So look for those “angel” items, gather them in a box or bag, and then look for an angel who is collecting items to share with others.

You might even want to get your kids involved, maybe your spouse, and definitely the friend down the street that could lose a few items from her personal stash.

Yes, find the order which returns to your home and soul when you have stripped yourself of what you don’t really need. Happy holidays!

I don’t care what anybody says, Thanksgiving is one of the most stressful days for me. How can we relieve the stress from this gratitude day? How about using the Thanks Bank concept.

This week before or after you get through the stresses of Thanksgiving day, prepare several lists that will help make next Thanksgiving easier. Then bank them in your monthly housecleaning plan index card box behind the November divider, and use them next Thanksgiving to be and appear calm and controlled.

I have three of these lists and retrieved them from my Housecleaning Plan index box today. Having these lists has saved me lots of trouble over the last several years.

- One card lists the items to do/purchase/find in order to be able to put on a nice Thanksgiving dinner. It includes things I need to buy at the store, items to retrieve from my basement storage room, a reminder to purchase or find holiday napkins.

- The second list has everything I need to do the before Thursday like arrange the table center piece and clean the turkey platter. We can even make/buy the pies and put them away. And one year I made rolls early and put them in the freezer as I knew it wasn’t going to happen on Thursday morning.

- The last list is the things I will need to do on Thursday so the meal will be served on time, such as cut the bread into cubes for the dressing, put the olives in the frig, and check a second time that I have cranberry sauce (the one item I tend to forget).

So create your own Thanks Bank by preparing 3 x 5 cards, one with the list for the grocery store, one with a list of activities to do before Thursday, and the last with a list of things to do on Thursday. Then your mind will be free to entertain the other stresses in your life right now, rather it be your husband’s responsibilities at work, your children’s needs at school, or how to handle a particular guest graciously.

You see, I got up at six o’clock Monday morning and went to the grocery store because I had completely forgotten to buy my turkey and at noon I was hacking away to remove the insides so it would thaw by Thursday. So this year I am adding another card to my Thanks Bank: buy turkey ONE WEEK early to give it time to thaw properly.

Take good care now, and remember, create your own Thanks Bank card system and you’ll be more ready for next year’s successful Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving, and remember to visit www.houseoforder.com to buy Christmas gifts for your family and friends. The gift of organization is a lifetime gift to influence and change for the better. Take care now.

This week in November, the week before Thanksgiving, I would like to suggest the concept of FINISH-FORWARD. You see, with one part of your heart, time management skills, and focus you should be finishing up before the holiday season officially begins next week. There are bills to pay, a little bit of deep cleaning here or there, some projects you have been working on that would best be finished up or at least brought to a partial finishing point and then put away until January.

On the other side, with the another part of your focus, may I suggest you immediately sit down and decide what your responsibilities will be for next Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. If you will be traveling, of course you will have to start packing and making up of the list of things to take. If you will be staying home and hosting company, it is time to prepare a list of what items to purchase, projects to do next Wednesday, activities for Thanksgiving morning, and what will need to be completed to make for a nice turkey dinner. Then, of course, you also have to plan Friday and Saturday if company is coming your way. Where will you go and what will you be doing?

So, you will be focusing this next week, if you are going to be more organized, on finishing up and forwarding ahead. You will going to be going into two directions at once, one foot will be putting the brakes on and the other will be pushing the gas pedal. To both stop and start, walk around your house today with the pen and paper in hand and say, “Yes, I need to take care of that. I had better put this away because our company is coming and I don’t want it broken. I think I’ll wrap this project up and put it away until January. I will clean the toilet a little bit better as the company will really notice the ring around toilet. I will get the ….”

Good luck this week, and remember to stay organized we’re focusing in two directions: FINISHING up and FORWARDING ahead. So finish up everything that can be put away and plan for the things you’ll need to do for Thanksgiving next week!

I have a good friend that is morning sick. Yes, she is newly pregnant, the second time, actually, and she isn’t sure she wants to go through with this process again. She has what I call double discouragement. It goes this way…

I’m morning sick,

So you can have your pick….

Help with the laundry,

Help with a chore

Help with the baby,

Or don’t knock on this door.

If you have double discouragement, whether it be from morning sickness, too many babies too close together, an ill child, a worrisome marriage, or even a challenging teenager or two, may I offer a simple suggestion?

Counter the double discouragement with a simple solution. No matter how bad today is, tomorrow might be better or it might be worse. If it is better, smile some more. If it is worse, get out a piece of paper and begin to list: What is on my mind, what can I do about it, where do I start?

Then promise yourself a 20-minute, yes just a 20-minute focus on something you can “do”. Doing something, anything, will make the morning sickness fad momentarily, make your children look more lovely, and make a bad day just a bit brighter. Yes, 20-minute miracles happen in my life all the time. Write it down, figure out a small, short beginning project, and go to work. Then write me about your experiences and I will share them at a future time.

1, 2, 3, GO! (And don’t forget to keep the bucket close by; morning sickness can be terribly volatile, even when you’re distracted for 20-minutes.)

Today I would like to share a tender story from a new friend I have gained this last month. She told me that when she was a little girl her mother spent hours canning fruit and making jam. They always had homemade bread and her mom smocked beautiful dresses for both her and her older sister.

When she was in seventh grade, her father lost his job, her mother had to go back to work to support the family, and her sister (seven years older) went away to college. During the next few years, her mother didn’t have time to do those “things” anymore, meaning canning fruit, making jam and teaching Sarah how to bake homemade bread.

And so even today, Sarah, who is a mother herself, has never done any one of these things and does not yet have the skills to do them. So today I ask you a question: what skills do you want to pass on to your daughters and sons? And if they are important to you, how can you organize your life to get them passed along? I guess I’m thinking about holiday season coming up. Instead of spending quite so much money on things they will simply own, could we give them a certificate “good for” teaching them a skill and then actually doing it with them? You see, from Sarah’s point of view, she would have loved to have had an hour with her mother learning how to make homemade jam or homemade bread. Or maybe even just shared an hour with her the learning the techniques of canning fruit.

What do you wish to pass on to the next generation and how can you order your life to spend an hour this week or an upcoming family night or a Sunday afternoon in the next few weeks to prepare to pass those on legacies? I know it is important to me that I received certain skills for my own parents. I know it is even more important for me to pass those skills on to the next generation.

So think about it, and in the mix-up, the mash, and the mess of the months of November, December, and January, ask yourself some important questions, ponder on how to proceed, and then share. We must share this legacy of homemaking skills (whatever they are and however you perceive they will best help your posterity) from generation to generation. Have a great week!

I would like to respond to a question I recently received from Jacy O. about building food and home storage shelving. You see, it does make a difference how you approach this project!

The specifications of shelf depth, spacing of shelves, and the specifics for preparing either a room or a wall to most effectively store food and other nonfood items is very important. I believe you need three depths of shelving. “Deep” shelving, as I call them, are shelves that holds cases of paper towels, toilet paper, disposable diapers, and other more bulky things. These need to be about 18”-20” deep. “Medium” shelving is shelving about 15-18” deep that holds flats of canned soups, fruits, and vegetables. “Narrow” shelving is only 10-12” and is great for holding cake mixes, cereal boxes, and other foods that are narrower.

You will want to have, in addition, to these three different depths of shelves, three heights of shelves. I like the first shelf from the floor to be about 30-36” above the floor. This will accommodate stacking two traditional round food storage buckets, one on top of another, so that items such as flour, sugar, oatmeal, and powdered milk can be kept in those buckets (with gamma lids). Then, have 15-18” tall shelves for the taller grocery items like the large cereal boxes, popcorn cans (which I use to store many items after the Christmas popcorn is gone). Lastly, have several 12-15” shelves, which will easily hold smaller height products with additional space to reach your hand in. Any space left above easy reaching distance could be left empty for lightweight, bulky items to be put way up high (always remembering to put the uprights to the ceiling to keep items from dropping off the ends of the shelves).

Keep in mind, when you make shelving, to have the uprights (supports) quite near each other (within 3’) as canned goods and other items can be quite heavy when stored in bulk. Take the time to paint and otherwise make this area beautiful. This will make going to your food and home storage area delightful. Also, have a little bit extra lighting (as our storage areas are usually without much natural light).

Remember, different depths and heights of shelves with sturdy supports in a brightly painted place with good lighting makes not only purchasing but storing your food and home storage a very pleasant experience. Take care now. Find more helpful ideas in the House of Order Handbook.

Hello friends! Recently, I received an inquiry from Lisa in Utah asking if I would share my feelings about a family mission statement. I would like to respond to that request as I highly encourage each and every family have a family mission statement.

When we do this, we focus our family’s values, goals, and ambitions in a particular direction. It identifies your focus and organizes your energy so that each member of the family can identify with something good and noble.

May I suggest four points to organizing and preparing a family mission statement. (Remember, it need not be long or complex.)

1) I would like to suggest your mission statement be based upon either a scripture like “I, Nephi, said unto my father, I will go ….” or a noble statement such as “Return with Honor”. This can be learned by the youngest and least eager member of the family and is the first step to clarifying a mission statement for your family.

2) The mission statement would go on and talk about positive characteristics you value in your family: honesty, integrity, a high work ethic, compassion, or whatever you feel are the characteristics where your family could and should focus.

3) The family mission statement might describe some family goals such as your desire for your children to be educated, strive for a wholesome marriage partner, and have their own families. Describing what values you would like them to be true to, what standards you hold dear, and what you value will pull you together.

4) Lastly, the family mission statement might also describe some areas of family unity like “in our family we will be kind and considerate of each other” or “in our family we will work together until the job is done right”. Use what you feel would work for your family to identify your family as special and unique and bring them closer to you and your spouse’s long-term desires for your children.

So I encourage you this week to think about a family mission statement. Speak to your spouse about it, maybe inquire of your children, and then remember to think on these four areas: 1) a scripture or a noble saying, 2) positive characteristics, 3) family goals; and, 4) family unity.

Take care now and have a great week. A family mission statement can really help!

This week, as a precursor to grander accomplishments, I would encourage you to organize your pens and pencils. When I do, I discover three things:

1) I keep things I don’t like (even though they were free and I won’t be out anything if they are gone) with the pretense that I “must use them up”. Now, I realize it is better to discard or share what really doesn’t work for me.

2) I keep too much out (yes, I know it is convenient to have plenty out, but we generally are a bit out of control). It is better to have less and be in control.

3) I need to organize like this more often. Usually, after a short time cleaning out and making decisions (however small), I feel better about my life.

So, this week, get into that desk drawer or empty the mug on your counter top, and take control. Discard or share what doesn’t work, keep and use your favorites, and notice the control that comes into your life.

Today I would like share ideas about the upcoming holidays. You see, once October hits we have to look at the calendar for a minute and start thinking in an orderly manner about how to prepare for these three pressures. Halloween is a mere four weeks away. Thanksgiving is early this year, on the 23rd, as a matter of fact, and Christmas has a very nice configuration because Christmas Eve will happen on a Sunday.

As you go about your life during these next three months, may I suggest considering an idea that works really well?

Today, to get out three sheets of paper and entitle them Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Over the next few days (as you go about your regular routines, projects, and chores), write down things you would like to do and arrangements that you need to make as they occur to you.

You now have a project list where you can record those ideas. This allows you to stay focused on your present needs, your current pressures, and your reoccurring responsibilities even as your mind shoots ahead and begins to think about “what costume would work well for four year-old Becky”, and how you will “accommodate Aunt Macey (who is in a wheelchair) for Thanksgiving”, and what you need so your friends can have a special, small gift as a December remembrance.

You see, our minds are so far ahead of our bodies that if we have a place prepared to capture the thoughts, they will be safe. Next week, the following week, and even the following week as you are ordering your life, deciding upon your priorities, and making out your shopping lists, you can refer to your “holiday” lists for additional aid.

Because you have prepared a way for those ideas to be captured when they come, you can rest assured this holiday season will be just a little bit different. I know it won't be easy, I know that we have very busy lives, but for me having a place to write down the thoughts when they occur to me helps keep Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas just a little bit more organized.

Take good care this week and enjoy this special cool weather, the changing leaves and all of the other things that come at this time of year even as you're starting to prepare for the three big, upcoming holidays.

I shared this article last year, but have had so many inquiries about these principles recently, I decided to write about it again and ask again, if things are working for you? Because if they aren't, it takes so little to make a huge difference.

I know that many of you have recently begun what I call the “school schedule”. You have sent your children off to school now for about three/four weeks and are beginning to settle into a routine that is working pretty well.

What I am going to encourage you to do is to streamline that routine just a little bit to make the rest of the school year go much nicer, easier, and have less bumps.

1) Do you have a specific place where each child puts items that need to be taken to school the next day? This is often called the “Launch Pad” and is a confined place where the child can put their backpack, their school lunch money, their apple for the science class, and anything else they need to remember to take to school. I like to have labeled, plastic buckets, one per child, in our home for the “launch pad”. No one thinks well when in the rush to get off to school. Gathering the night before and putting everything in the “launch pad” makes good sense.

2) Do you have a specific routine for getting the children ready for school each day? Most children should be encouraged to decide what they will wear to school the night before. The clothes should be laid out, complete with socks and shoes. Then tomorrow’s dressing will be quick, decision-less, and easy. Try it, it makes all the difference!

3) Do you have a weekly menu for breakfast that the children can rely on? I know that many of you have cold cereal on school mornings, but even then have you set up a routine for getting the table set, each child’s dishes cleared after eating, and their teeth brushed (and the toothbrush put away and the toothpaste lid put back on)?

Slowly down for the next week and working with each child individually until they have learned these simple habits will make for long-term benefits. Try it, you will definitely like it!

September 19, 2006 (Happy Anniversary, Dad and Mom Calder, my parents) - Give Me Some Space!

Once in a while, sometimes several times in a single year, we get caught up in some massive project, some major trauma, or even just find that several smaller challenges come all at once into our lives.

When they are done, the company is gone, the house is quiet again, or the challenge has passed, we might find ourselves exhausted, deeply fatigued, or even just plain cranky about life. We feel confused, unmotivated, and even sometimes angry.

When this happens, may I suggest that we practice some well-known and highly-practical advice. Let’s plan into the upcoming week some “space”. I have talked about this before, but I see it happening so few times in the hectic lives of those I love. I see women I admire running, running, and running some more until there is no more “run” in them.

Especially when we are at the end of our ropes we must take the time, even make the time, to come back to a place of order in our own personal lives. This doesn’t need to take an inordinate amount of time, but it must be planned, it must be kept sacred and secure in our routine, and it must take priority. We just can’t continue to run forever on fumes.

I have seen several techniques which work wonderfully well. If you cannot leave your home because of many small children, endless laundry, and stacks of dirty dishes, just take a whole five minutes (yes, you can use a timer) and sit on the porch and breathe deeply, listen carefully, and watch an insect walking through his own life of troubles.

If you are at work, take a walk “somewhere” where you can see outside and hold still for one whole minute. Yes, just one whole minute of repose can really make a difference and five minutes will make you a renewed person.

If you are able, take a walk (in a new direction) from your work or your home and look for something to be curious about, someone to smile at, or something to be grateful for….yes, just a little space makes it possible to dive back into the cold waters of reality with a new smile, an easy gait, and a renewed zest for life.

Without (as my dear husband says) also having an alternative plan, a backup tool, or a spare part!

I am learning there are many times when I'm simply not prepared for the inevitable challenges which life brings. I think you know what I mean. We run out of gas for our lawnmower, or use a favorite levi skirt until the back seams rips open during the wash cycle, or we even keep a vacuum and nurse it along hoping that it won’t break anytime soon. While I am all for duct tape and the miracles of creative repairs, I also believe we must be thinking ahead.

If we continue to regularly run out of gas while mowing the lawn, wouldn’t it be smart to have a spare gallon stored and ready? If your skirt is getting a little thin on the rear, what will you do if it wears through and you don’t have time for a shopping trip? And if the vacuum is on his last legs, which will be the best next purchase to make?

I know you probably have several of these kind of trusted and treasured tools, clothing and habits in your lives? At least, if you are like the many people that I coach, you do. So for a minute today, where can you better prepare for the eventual “death” of something that has served you well for a long time?

You see, it is better to get ready now and know what the next step will be instead of waiting and worrying when it breaks. Is your refrigerator starting to make funny sounds? Maybe a trip to the library to learn from “Consumer Reports” about current frig technology would help. Of maybe an evening date with your spouse shopping for refrigerators might be wise. Then, if and when the frig does bite the dust, you are ready to purchase with confidence. If a classic piece of clothing is beginning to wear thin, it is time to look for another. We always want to be “at our leisure” when we purchase new tools and treasures. We just make better decisions that way.

So this week, as you work through your routines, walk through your daily schedule, and otherwise find items that you regularly rely on, ask, “What if? How will I? What will we do?”

It will be easier that way and you will find you’ll feel more in charge of at least small area of your time and your life.

September 4, 2006 - I’m stressed! Time to Withdraw, Regroup, and Re-Emerge

I’ve had an interesting week. In fact, it has been one of those weeks which held it’s normal share of disturbances, challenges, and unknowns. But for me, this week was extra heavy in the stress department, probably not so much because of what happened, but because I keep having weeks like this. It just catches up with you.

When you get stressed and you realize you’re not managing it well, what do you do? Since I have been there a few times myself, may I suggest the following three thoughts: withdraw, regroup, and re-emerge.

Yes, I believe the first step to bringing order back to your mind is to step back a pace or two. In fact, I like the idea of complete isolation, almost total quiet, and plenty of space. It may not always happen, but when you feel the need, head towards your master bedroom if you are at home, go to the restroom if you are at work, or maybe just take a walk if you can get away. You need some space to withdraw enough to see the forest. Sometimes the trees just get too big and are too many to see how you are going to deal with the whole jungle.

Second, I believe that you have to regroup. This includes reviewing your priorities, deciding if it is going to be cornflakes for dinner again, if the wash can be handled by your spouse tonight, if your teenager can manage your two other children so you can have an hour alone at the library to work uninterrupted. In other words, review for a few moments options to do things differently, and maybe this time by doing something that will work better.

Third, re-emerge again into your life. When you do, take a moment to notify those around you that things may need to be a little different today. No you are not going to go to that meeting, yes you are planning on a simple dinner, no you won’t be able to wash those special pants until Saturday, yes you would appreciate some babysitting help this evening. Remember, it is up to you and me to make life work for our families, in our workplace, and all through our life.

So, in the end, it is also up to us to withdraw a pace, regroup to find better organization possibilities, and then re-emerge with a sense of leadership and a smile with which to work through the current stresses.

Remember, it doesn’t do much good to worry about the past. Just look forward, ask for help when and where you need it, and go slower to get more done. Always, always when stress overcomes your better self, it seems to work best to withdraw, regroup, and then re-emerge. They will love you for being back on top of the it again, and you will usually, in the end, get more done in less time.

It was Education Week at Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah last week and I had the privilege of speaking at different home organization sessions. However, because of those preparations and my involvement in getting my printed materials ready, I totally spaced some rather important preparations for family celebrations. I did this last year, too, so I have some more learning to do. Because of that, I would like to share a previous hint and incorporate it into my life as well.

Have you had the “totally-spaced” experience before? If so, I have a few suggestions for myself and anyone else who needs to make an apology for being later or forgetting. Make your apology, being as honest as you can about what really happened, and then make preparations so that it will never happen again.

I remember that after I had missed an important birthday two years in a row because it was on the 3rd of the month and by the time I remembered to turn the page on my calendar (this was before I discovered planners), it was too late to send a birthday card or make a timely phone call. So, on the third year, I decided to make preparations to avoid another disaster. I put the note regarding this birthday, and every other birthday within the first week of the month, on the first day of the last week of the previous month.

I will do the same thing with next year’s Education Week’s web page article. I will make a note to write it in the middle of the July (when I am less stressed), so all I have to do is add it at the right time.

In many ways, there are so many other times and places where we can look ahead and thus avoid disasters, embarrassing moments, and otherwise untimely incidents. For myself, I am going to look ahead into September and see where I might be “more timely”, doing things that have deadlines way before they are due. Who knows, I might be sick, forget, or “space it” when the stress builds. No matter what, if I look ahead, plan and prepare, I am more likely to be calm, collected and “with it”!

So look at your upcoming month and ask what you can do to avoid potential disasters. It is surely a habit I am going to incorporate into my schedule. Happy “disaster avoidance”!

I am sure you have had several of this kind in your own life, but yesterday, I brought home from the printers my House of Order Handbook, printed professionally for the first time. It is a very exciting time for me and I wanted to share the joy that comes when you persevere, keep going against the odds, the challenges, and the doubters in your life.

So, share a root beer with your favorite person in my behalf and let's all celebrate. I began writing my book in 1986. Yes, that was twenty years ago! It was a small idea then, mostly articles saved in a binder with tidbits of ideas which came quickly and would have been gone forever except that I wrote them down and put them also in that binder.

So if you have a dream of doing something interesting or exciting in another season of your life, but know it just isn't practical right now, may I suggest a DREAM BINDER. Keep the articles, the pictures, and your ideas in this one special place, and who knows but that twenty years from now you will be the author of your own first book!

Take care now and I will share more of my excitement next week, because if you do one book, you might as well do two (and that's what I am working on for B.Y.U. Education Week in Provo, Utah)....

Storing unused children's clothing in an organized manner can be a real chore unless you have a system set up that works well! If you do, then it is easy, fun, and convenient! So let's get going and get all those extra clothes out of their bedrooms and safely put away for the next child.

1) Gathering supplies. It is best to purchase, find, or collect containers which will be useful for long-term storage. I prefer ones about the size of copy paper boxes (often available for the asking at your local copy center) and/or produce boxes (also available for the asking at your local grocery store in the produce department). They should be stackable (when empty or full), sturdy, and clean.

If you purchase plastic containers, those which are "semi-opaque" make it easier to see inside to the contents and allow for easy labeling of the boxes with large words printed on sheets of paper which are put just inside both ends of the containers. This storage container investment will be well worth the trouble because you will be able to use these containers over and over again until your children are grown.

2) Labeling the containers. I would suggest at least two boxes for each year of your children's ages (one for summer clothes, another for winter clothes). If you have children ages 2-8 you will want 2 boxes labeled "1 year-old summer" and "1 year-old winter" (for clothes which have been outgrown), 2 boxes labeled "2 year-old summer" and "2 year-old winter", and 2 boxes for all the other years to eights years old, plus two boxes labeled "9 years-old summer" and "9 years-old winter" as there always seems to be clothes floating around which are just a bit too big for the oldest child. If you have boys and girls, you can also divide the clothes accordingly "1 year-old girls' summer" and "1 year-old boys' summer", etc.

Sometimes when I suggest so many boxes, people just laugh at me and say they can't possibly devote that much space to storing clothes. If you are in that category, you can use 1 box for every two years of age (and storing the clothes accordingly) or just 1 box for every year (eliminating the separation into summer and winter clothes). It just makes for a little more hassle when getting and out of the boxes.

3) Consider other needs. You might also consider gathering containers and labeling them for: shoes, underwear, swimwear, winter accessories, costumes, and socks. I find these kinds of items easier to store separately as I am in these containers alot. I often use clear ziploc bags which are labeled "1, 2, 3, 4", etc. for the socks' box and keep the appropriate folded socks inside the right labeled bag inside the "socks" box. This allows me to also buy socks on sale and have a place to keep them until they are needed. I use the same method for underwear, taking advantage of sales when I can.

4) Have a massive organizing party. This usually means letting your children share an afternoon at a neighbor's house (and then returning the favor for your neighbor). It means neglecting your ringing phone and doorbell. With focus and hard work, you can empty your children's closets and bedrooms ONE at a time and sort the clothes you desire to store into your containers (which you might lay out around the edges of your master bedroom walls for convenience).

After you have sorted through your clothes, pick out outfits which you will let your children use right now. If you wash about three times a week you might have three shirts and two pants for the elementary-aged children, five shirts and three pants out for your junior high children, and have seven shirts and seven pants out for your high school children. I also suggest one set of Sunday clothes for the boys and two for the girls (until they reach teenagehood when they seem to need more variety). If you wash less often you will proportionally want more clothes out. But, KEEP THE "OUT" CLOTHES TO A MINIMUM. You can rotate more clothes out when you need, but for the most part, KEEP MOST OF YOUR CLOTHES STORED. Children don't need alot of clothes to be happy. They simply have their minds on alot of other things, so keep it simple. (Yes, yes you will want to have a dress-up box handy for those creative moments.)

5) Store the extras away. After you have chosen which clothes to keep out, put the rest of the clothes into the containers, close them up, and store them where they will be convenient and yet out of the way (usually in the basement or a garage). When the seasons change, school begins again, or you find a child is rapidly moving out of the clothes which they are currently wearing, down you go to your storage containers, storing the undersized items and pulling out new, large clothing.

6) A "TO BE STORED" container. As a last thought, I have found it easiest to have one of my storage containers labeled "To Be Stored". Thus, when I am in a rush and receive clothing which needs sorting and storing, or know it is time to put something away but don't have the mental energy to store it right now, I have a temporary stopping place for these items. It helps keep all the clothes confined and conquered!

Good luck this week. Set up a clothing storage system for your children and you will find that everything will be easier at your house from cleaning up their rooms to doing the their laundry.

Fourth Week of July , 2006 - Organizing for the Next Reunion this Reunion!

I attended another family reunion this last month. It was a gathering of extended family from all over the United States for a family wedding. Just as I did at least year's reunion, I re-learned several important things during this three days which might help next time you have a family reunion. So, I decided to share this information again. It is just so timely...

1) Seize the moment. Have an extra copy of the current name, address, email, and phone number list which every participant can check for accuracy so preparing an information list next time will be faster and easier.

2) Always, always, always take pictures while you can. Also, make notes about people you particularly connected with during your visit. For myself, I met people I have never seen before and some of them I particularly enjoyed being around, including a judge who is also a mother of three, an elementary teacher who is now a stay-at-home mom, and a woman that is contemplating the responsibility of having her mother-in-law live in her home soon. We were kindred spirits of sorts and it will be nice to contact them again soon. Being able to network, even with your extended family members, can bring great benefits down the line when you face the same problems or have children who are going through challenges.

3) Prepare for the next time now. Make up a file entitled, “Family Reunion July 2006” and keep in it several things:

a) Keep the schedule of this year’s reunion showing the specific places where you gathered, the games you played, the songs you sang, and a short list of what program items were included. It will save you a lot of time when it is your turn. Instead of wondering, you will just turn to your file and have this important information in front of you.

b) Make brief written notes delineating your opinions about what happened and how you might do it different next time: “the DVD slide show was great because they added music”, “the lunch was delicious except for that one purple salad”, “the name tags were prepared in triplicate and distributed every morning to keep things sorted out which worked wonderfully”.

c) Gather information regarding the professionals that smoothed the way: the company that made up the t-shirts, the printer that compiled the attractive address book, and the company that prepared the slide show DVD.

4) Tie up the loose ends. For instance, make sure you know how long everyone is staying so you can say good-bye to everyone. In our case, some of the relatives left a day earlier than I had expected and I didn’t get to say my “love yous” and “hope you enjoyed our time together” and “I hope we will see each other again”. The last morning they were just gone and I am left empty and sad. Also, make sure you say thank you do those that made it happen when you say your last good-bye. Next time you might need their advice….

I know you are wondering why I am discussing the preparation of the next family gathering even while you enjoy this one, but its important because soon it will be your turn. So seize the moment, keep good notes, take plenty of pictures, and tie up all the loose ends. These gatherings don’t happen often enough and its so easy to make preparations now which will save time, trouble, and hassle the next time around.

Being organized for a layover on a plane (or for that matter, any other inconvenient delay) is an interesting adventure. First of all, you never know when or how it will happen, how long you will be waiting, and under what circumstances your life comes to a sudden slow down or maybe even a sharp and completed stop.

I certainly didn’t know the brake of our plane would give out just as we were about to take off. This means you might need those things you thought about taking on the plane but instead have put in your checked luggage. After all, they are heavy, so why carry on this flight your writing pad or your book that you didn’t even need on your last flight? But here you sit, waiting for at least an hour, maybe two, with nothing to occupy you and sitting so close to two strangers that you are particularly glad you took a shower this morning.

So, what can we learn from this? Double dutch! Yes, double up on any and everything when you travel. Keep a larger book for reading at your leisure in your big suitcase, a smaller, more compact one with you at all times in your purse or carry-on luggage. Keep your writing, zipped pad of paper with you until it is too heavy to be convenient, but always, always, have a small pad of paper and a pencil. Always! You just never know when that important idea will come, when the moment will appear to write the thank you note to your hostess, or what else might come to mind.

Doubling up is a good thing to do any time you are away from home. Having an extra, stored something, some place just gives you the peace of mind to keep yourself entertained, financially able to get a sandwich and to sustain your capacity to do things on paper. You see, the moments of possibility come so unexpectedly. You rush all day to pack and get ready, leaving your writing and reading as undone niceties and then rush to get through security and onto the plane. When you have finally settled and have one, two or three hours free, you find that you’re not properly prepared to work, relax, or learn.

Maybe I am the only one with this problem, for some passengers seemed to have their books ready, but then I saw a lot of bored, frustrated and otherwise impatient passengers who hadn’t planned on this adjustment to their schedule. How would anyone know that and extra hour would be spent waiting while the airplane’s brake was replaced?

So from this experience I have learned to be more thoroughly prepare for the unlikely, although probable possibility that somewhere in any day, at any time, I might find myself with an open minute or an hour to do what I never seem to get to during my regular routines and challenging days. So double dutch everything. It will make it nicer to wait, keep you more relaxed, and help you gain greater expediency in your everyday “travels” (wherever you may be going).

By the way, having written this article on a borrowed laptop (owned by someone more prepared than I), the hour(s) passed more quickly than not and we were soon on our way to Cleveland, Ohio, the next stop on my way home.

It is getting easier and I am getting used to the feelings in my heart, but even as I do, I am learning that when you are in a stressful situation or an unusual place where things are not making much sense, it is best to order yourself in such a way as to do what matters MOST first.

This means that you move from more SIMULTANEOUS living (doing a lot of things all at once) to somewhat SEQUENTIAL living (focusing on one, then another, and finally a third).

It seems that when stress increases, our capacity to deal with a lot of different options, projects, and responsibilities diminishes. This is not because we are weak, bad, or otherwise faulty. It is just a fact of life!

So when the going get rough, tough, and otherwise impossible (even when it doesn’t seem it should be that way from anyone else’s point of view), may I suggest you become more linear and less spatial.

For instance, you have awaken one morning and know it is going to be a “slow” day. You are up late, you are not your best self, the housework seems endless, the children are out of sorts, and your mind is a fog about whether to start the dishes, get a batch of wash going, or maybe just to give up altogether and climb back in bed.

Before you totally give up and just switch on the TV for awhile, list everything that is on your mind. Yes, get it out on paper. Yes, everything. Then separate the tasks into three different kinds: MUST DO TODAY, WOULD LIKE TO GET TO THIS WEEK, and CAN WAIT FOR LATER.

Rewrite your list into three different lists. Put the CAN WAIT FOR LATER list in the back of your planner. (It will be the last list to tackle.) Put the WOULD LIKE TO GET TO THIS WEEK list at the end of this week’s pages. (It will be there when and if you have energy to think about it.)

Now take the MUST DO TODAY list and by adding 1, 2, or 3, etc. to each item of your list, decide the exact order in which you will face your day.

Yes, I know that this is taking a lot of time, but it will save trouble, decision-making, and lots of frustration for the rest of the day. With a list of what to do and in which order to do it, you now have focus, you now can live SEQUENTIALLY. This will make is easier and faster to get going and keep going through the day.

Face the first item, tackle it, take care of it, and then go on to the next (between changing diapers, wiping noses, and answering questions if you have small ones). Then go on to the second item (and answer phones, keep your boss happy, and smile at the customers if you are at work). Then the third, fourth, and on and on.

You will get through today more successful and happier than any other way. Good luck this week. Write if you need help or maybe if you have a story of your own to share at houseoforder@gmail.com.

Some major changes came into my life this weekend. I won’t go into details, but I am sorrowing as I try to comprehend. And in that sorrow I am learning some lessons about keeping your life ordered while you adjust.

1) When change is suddenly thrust upon you, it is important, even essential to GO SLOW. Yes, keep the routines you can trust and know as a part of your life. Eat the same foods with which you are comfortable, wear clothes that fit loosely and won’t trouble you, and most importantly don’t make any major decisions or try to pro-actively alter much about your current situation. The changes which have been thrust upon you are enough for now.

2) Allow those close around you to let you mourn. Let them help you with the dishes, with the wash, and with the housecleaning. You will still need to supervise, to be involved, and to coordinate a lot, but let others take over just a bit. You need to cry, to take long walks, and to get a grip. You hadn’t expected this change and it suddenly, quite unexpectedly, makes everything different from now on.

3) Keep a list. Yes, there will things that come to mind that will need attending to, items which are critical to keep life running smoothly, and others which can wait until you are up and going again. But keep that list up to date so that when you surface again, you can return to functioning with some capacity. I keep this list in the front of my planner. Also, when someone calls and asks if they can help, I reply in the positive and then search down my list until I find something appropriate for the situation. “Would you mind picking up my dry cleaning for me?” “How about weeding my front boardwalk?” “Would it be possible for your to substitute for me on Tuesday?” When friends and acquaintances ask to help, let them. Even the smallest bits of help go a long way to alleviate your stress and fill you with support and love.

4) Lastly, listen to your body. When it needs to eat, eat a bit. When it needs to sleep, slip away into a quiet room and let it rest. When it needs to cry, let it cry and cry and cry. The days will get brighter and shorter and easier to walk through, but when sudden change dumps a lot of emotion on you, respond as your body demands.

Some day soon you will be able to function better again. But go slow, mourn as needed, let others help, and listen to your body until then. Good luck this week! May brighter days be around the corner for both of us.

Are the swim suits, beach towels, multiple flip-flops, goggles, and water toys out at your house? What a mess they can make in your home and back yard. Which belong to you and which are the neighbors? Where do you put the dripping wet clothing items and towels when the children come in from their play? How do you organized the toys and paraphernalia so they can find everything again easily?

Here are some ideas to make this summer just a bit more organized (at least for you):

1) Assign one swimsuit, one set of flip flops, and one bath towel to each child for the entire summer. Label GENEROUSLY as necessary. New swimsuits, flip flops, and bath towels are only given out with good reason and after a hefty penalty (i.e., a tough, tedious summer job). This helps children learn responsibility and maturity (often the hard way).

2) Assign goggles and toys, too, to each child. This means everyone in your family has something(s) for which they are responsible to clean up, even if they didn’t play with it this time around. Or, have one day a week when there is a “life guard” in charge of finishing up the swimming event for today by making sure everything is cleaned up.

3) Have an outdoor dressing room. Hang an umbrella upside down from the roof of your overhang eve, or from the garage roof. Use the metal tips as holders for an old shower curtain. This makes a small, private dressing area for children taking off their wets and getting into their dries.

4) Hang an outdoor clothes line, down low, and teach the children to hang their swimsuits using the clothes pins (which are left on the line for the children's convenience). Have "labeled" bins for the toys, goggles, and flip flops. If you are going to be doing this all summer, make it as easy as possible.

5) Offer a snack (a regular routine at our house) once the swimsuits and towels are hung, the toys put away, and the flip flops all stored.

Its wonderful to have the kids outside playing, its nice when they clean up their own mess, and its great when they can find what they need again tomorrow for the next day in the water. Good luck. It won't be perfect every day, but at least it can be nicer.

Good luck this week. Set up a clothing storage system for your children and you will find that everything will be easier at your house from cleaning up their rooms to doing the their laundry.

First Week of June - Setting Up the Laundry Room to Expedite the Laundry!

We talked about this last year, but it is time to review, revise, and redo! So let's look at the laundry room again and see what we see:

It is always astounding to me the importance of "setting up" a room to get the job done right. This is especially true of the laundry room. You see, we can do this job with no extra helpers, or we can take a day and set up the room to help us for all the years ahead! So my challenge to you this week is to get your laundry room set up to expedite the laundry. How?

1) Store the laundry soap (granulated or liquid) convenient to the washing machine. I like to have mine at the same level as the washing machine, to get the soap in the washer easy and convenient. Currently I buy my laundry soap in granulated form and thus have three 40-lb. buckets stacked on each other, the top one open, right next to my washer. Scooping is easy and there is little spilled soap.

2) Get a wastebasket convenient to the dryer for lint disposal. I have mine at the level of the dryer top so I can pull off the lint, deposit it neatly, and keep the "dust" to a minimum. It may not seem a big deal, but if you have the wastebasket close by, you can collect the lint every time you use the dryer and save money. If you can put it right in the wastebasket without moving much you will also save a mess.

3) Prepare a place to put the clothes when they are dried. This means a rod (usually a tension shower rod between two walls or a curtain rod hung from chain which is connected to hooks screwed into the ceiling). It also means plenty of standardized plastic hangers (get rid of all those various-sized metal hangers which you might have inherited from the dry cleaners, the hangers which came with clothes purchases, and any other odd-sized hangers which are weak and misshapen). Finally, it means setting up a table, countertop or even stocked boxes covered with a blanket where you can fold and stack laundry. This folding table should be located near the dryer to be of the best use. You see, it doesn't have to be expensive or even store-boughten to do the job well. It just needs to be there. Rod, hangers, folding table! Figure out a plan, make some purchase, set things up.

4) Collect or purchase containers for your clean and folded laundry. This will contain it until you can put it away yourself or better yet, have your family members (adult and children alike) help with this part of the process. Remember, those who contribute also appreciate! Besides, it takes a big job and cuts it down to manageable size. Rebecca puts away the wash cloths in the kitchen drawer, Fred puts the main bathroom towels and wash clothes away. Timothy puts the car wash rags back in the garage box. As a final note, you might want these containers to also be the dirty clothes buckets/baskets for your bathrooms. This will save time and trouble. You collect the buckets from the bathrooms, get the wash done, put the wash away and reput the buckets back in the bathrooms again.

5) Buy a timer. Use this to time the washer. Use it to time how long it takes to fold a batch of laundry. Use it when the children put their laundry away as a motivator. It will help keep the laundry process on its way and make it fun, besides!

Doing laundry may never be done. It may never even be pleasant. But you can do several things this week to make it more expedient which will let you get on to other, nicer housework! Have a good week!

Dear Marie, Thank you so much for your newsletter. I am old and I am still learning. I have found many of your ideas great time and energy savers.

I would like to share an idea that works for me to get the laundry done. I have a chest type freezer in my laundry area and it is just the right size to fold the clothes on. When I put the clothes from the washer to the dryer I stop and fold and hang the clothes from the dryer immediately. This saves me so much time and the clothes don't have time to get wrinkled.

Even if I can't take them to the drawers or closets right then, the clothes are at least folded neatly or hung on hangers. (I used to put them on my bed but would then forget to get to them until bedtime and I hated doing laundry because of that.) Perhaps even putting up a card table or other small table on laundry day to fold clothes on in the laundry room would help inspire others to make this chore more pleasant. I also have a radio in there too which also helps.

Happy Laundry Day to All. Kathleen Merrill 01-2010

She died. Yes, Sally, my sweet cousin, died this last week. Of course, we should have been ready and yet we were surprised, and in the end I found out I wasn’t very organized to help. What I mean is that I have never prepared myself to serve (at a moment’s notice) another who might be suffering. As a matter of fact, even though I have been through the death of my young son, I really don’t think I yet know the best way to give when death has visited.

But I have been thinking about it this weekend, and really believe we can organize ourselves to be ready to serve. This is because the service will always (or almost always) be needed when you already have a packed schedule, other commitments, or some heavy emotional demands. So if you have things prepared, it will be easier to love. Here are three ideas to consider:

1) Have a simple silk flower arrangement, scented candle, or another small, appropriate gift made up, wrapped, and ready to take with you to the home of the bereaved when you first go to visit. This doesn’t have to be fancy or large, but will remind the family (for a long time to come) that you were ready to love when they needed loving.

2) Have a simple, edible treat frozen and ready to share with the family or guests who might be coming to their home. This would best be something that can stay out on the counter without failing, spoiling, or needing much attention. One good woman always kept a tray of cinnamon rolls in her freezer ready to ice and take at a moment’s notice. Oh, how good they tasted to those hungry but with no energy to cook!

3) Have a supply of condolence cards available to choose from to accompany any personal note you might make to send your greetings and feelings to the bereaved by mail. Those who mourn are waiting for your concern, your love, and your written messages. It buoys them up through the long days after the death and funeral.

Yes, I know that you might be able to do more the next time death comes close, but to be ready with something at a moment’s notice will make it more peaceful for you when life’s other obligations are also knocking.

So good luck this week, and hug those kids, your spouse, and your parents for me. It seems someone is always leaving too soon!

I have a cousin that has cancer and is saying goodbye. In addition to being her cousin, I am also an admirer, one who from the distance has watched her hair go and then come again, and now see it gone once more. One who has seen courage and the challenge of living when the will to live is sapped by fatigue and discouragement. She has the same cancer for many years, first small and curable (it seemed), and now all-consuming and terrifying. I was hopeful at the beginning, and told her so, and now must have the same courage and frankness about dying which she shows. She greets me with a “Hello, Marie!” as though today were like any other day we have been together, only now I am the caretaker of her needs and her young son. I love her and I want her to know that now. Not tomorrow, not next week, not when it is too late! Do you have the same unfinished “love you” business in your life, too?

If so, do me a favor. In fact, do yourself a favor. When you are at the store next, buy a package of small note cards (small enough that your message doesn’t need to be long to be meaningful). Come home, put stamps on each of the envelopes, along with a return address label. Put a note card inside the flap of each envelope and put these “packets” in a zip lock bag convenient and ready to serve you. Now you are prepared to tell those you love how much they mean, easily and quickly, with a short note, a lick of the envelope and their address. (There may be times when an email will do the same thing, but for the ill there is something nicer and more tangible about envelopes, handwriting, and a note card to hold.)

Keeping up with your “love yous” keeps our mind at peace. I am going to the store again today and do it myself. Notes, envelopes, stamps, and return address labels. I will get them ready and when the urge or the need comes to tell someone how important they are to me, it will be easy. I can do it and be done. You can, too!

I am not sure why it happens, but when stress builds in a family, it seems to build in several places at once. Have you noticed? It seemed like every time we were about to have a new baby, my husband was also facing some change or promotion at his job. I would have a stressful week because of a major commitment and he would be down with a serious cold. I would be down with a case of the flu when he was going out of town for several days and couldn’t help me with the children. I think you can see the pattern.

What can you do now to be ready to slip into “auto-pilot” and survive the double or triple stresses which surround you? Several preparations have helped me.

1) Have several canned meals which can be heated and served by the most inadequate cook. I like canned ravioli, canned tamales, and canned chili. I only serve these meals when I am sick, have had a harried day away from home, or have collapsed with fatigue from a long day at home. The children think we are having a party. I get my respite.

2) Begin a written list of things that can wait and have a shelf in your closet where you can put “items to be attended to later”. (Don’t leave them out and about for they will just bother and nag you.) When I feel the tension build, I begin my list and my stash: “Yes, I can mend those pants later as I have an extra pair my son can wear now.” “Yes, I can return that broken vase later.” “Yes, I can take a meal into that new mother in a couple of weeks. She might even need it more then.”

3) I alert everyone who might be affected about our upcoming stresses. Then I plan around them as best as I can. In other words I alter, minimize, and delete. For instance, I tell husband that I will be “out of commission” on Tuesday (as I have a major speaking commitment that evening). I let my children know that if they need homework help it would be best if they asked before dinner on Wednesday (as I will be going with their dad to a major work function). I, in turn, keep Friday afternoon open to help my husband with his church commitment (by planning to do my afternoon chores either Friday morning or Saturday).

So, because this week is a major stress time for me, and my husband, and my son (I won’t go into all the details) and because you might also be having one of those weeks, I invite you to join me for a can of chili tonight. And tomorrow, and Friday.

For Monday mornings are now big days: I am going to begin doing a segment on AM820 at 7:50 a.m. I will be there every Monday sharing ideas about home organization, decorating, cooking, and shopping. Please come join me. You can write me at keepitsimple@utaham820.com any time with questions or problems. I will address them on the weekly segment!

So good luck with your stresses this week. Keep a good stock of easy meals, put aside what can wait for next week’s relative calm, and tell everyone why you are SO EXCITED! They will understand. They have been there before and can help you until you come down from the clouds and can pilot again yourself!

We all know that using the right tool makes any job easier. But, can you find your tools when you need them?

Are you always digging around for the right tool? Hammers abound, but why are the flat-edge screwdrivers always missing? Wouldn’t it be great to have everything in an easy-to-find space? Here are some steps and tips to get you on your way.

First, start by gathering all your tools. Make a list of the locations where you found your tools. Garage, kitchen, basement, car, truck? Lay them all out on a bedsheet or blanket. Sort them by type to get an idea of how many different kinds of tools you have.

· Have I ever used it? Some tools passed down thru the family should be kept for sentimental reasons, but others that you’ve never used can surely go.

· Have I replaced it with a multi-purpose tool that does the job more efficiently?

Toss out the broken tools, sell the good ones on eBay, get a tax break by donating to a local charitable organization, have a “yard sale for men” or help a favorite college grad begin their first tool box. Only keep the tools you are sure to use in the future.

Using your list of locations from step 1, think about how and where you use your tools. You may decide to centralize your tools in the garage or basement. Begin sorting your tool collection into groups according to their desired location. This will help you to determine the storage space requirements for each area.

The internet is a great tool for finding the latest tool storage solutions. Portable tool boxes are great for on-the-go types to keep in their car or truck. Behind-the-wheel tool boxes for pickup trucks are a great way to take advantage of unused truck bed space. If you have a ton of small parts, you may consider some plastic storage cabinets with sliding drawers. Pegboards work nicely in the garage or basement workspace to keep tools handy and off the countertops. Maybe you need some new shelving to store larger-sized tools.

If you’ve ordered a new tool box or some other item, then when it arrives begin to place your tools in order. Once you’ve got everything in its place, remember to always take the extra time to put items away when they are done being used. If you’ve added a pegboard, consider drawing an outline around each tool as it hangs on the pegboard to make it easier to know where to return the tool.

Get motivated—you’ll be glad you did. Once you’re organized, maybe you’ll even have space to buy some new tools!

Sarah Wagner, my guest, wrote this article to share with us. See www.homeorganizershops.com for a great selection of storage and organization products designed to make your life easier! Copyright 2006, Home Organizer Shops, All rights reserved.

About this time of year, every year, since my first son went to kindergarten, I get Pre-Summer Stress. This is how my feelings go:

1) I stress out about all the projects I began since last September and haven't yet finished. If I don't get these projects under control and/or completed by the end of the school year, I won't get to them again until next September. It is not very good on my "mama" ego to have lingering "undones" hanging around all summer.

2) I stress out about all the "entertainment" needed to keep the children actively engaged in order to preserve some sort of order into our "family" life. Of course, I also want to keep up their mathematical skills, improve their reading skills, help them improve their housekeeping skills, and keep the house in a semblance of control. (Isn't is funny how we over-stress?)

3) I stress about how I can make this summer special, different and more perfect than all the rest. It just seems that every year I am run ragged by the questions, constant arguing, and the needs of so many different-aged children going in so many different directions. And then there is the early dawn, the late sunset, and the heat which also are part of these precious weeks.

So as a mother, a wife, and a woman, how do you grapple with the Pre-Summer Stress sufficiently to plan, prepare, and promote a successful summer? May I share several concepts which have helped me survive past summers and will, hopefully, make this one work a littler smoother, too?

1) Before summer even begins, walk through the routine of your "regular" summer days. Decide, decide, decide! Set parameters, rules, and other "fences" to keep control. For instance, decide when breakfast will be served each weekday morning (even for those who have been up half the night in the backyard pup tent). Also decide when you will regularly serve lunch. Work through breakfast and lunch menus. (This can be done with the help of your children, but write up some guidelines now about the possibilities from which they can choose.) Decide what housekeeping skills you will teach your children and how you will keep them on track each day until they have completed their assigned tasks. Decide if and when you will work with their musical instrument practice, mathematical skills, and reading challenges. In other words, look at your needs and decide upon some logical methods to keep control.

In some families, it has proven helpful to have neighborhood children scarce until after the morning chores are done, the piano has been practiced, addition flash cards have been finished, and some reading has been done. If there is a sign on the door, say the friendly "please visit us after noon" kind, you will find that others will respect your "summer" mornings more. Then, knowing that what needed doing is done, you can more freely let your children roam during the afternoon hours.

2) Depending on the number of children you have, assign each child a day of the week. This means, for instance, that Bradley has Mondays and Thursdays, Monica has Tuesdays and Fridays, and Scott has Wednesdays and weekends. On their day(s), this child gets to sit in the front seat of your vehicle, helps with lunch (fixing, serving, and clean-up), gets to choose the book you will read after lunch, and has the first turn in the bath tub. I think you can see just how much trouble this "assign a day" method saves.

3) Walk through possible summer afternoon activities to keep the mini-monsters occupied on those days when they are not at a friend's home and have already used up their TV time. I find it best to label each day of the week with a certain kind of activity. For example, Mondays-drawing, Tuesdays-visit a park, Wednesdays-library, Thursdays-movie, and Fridays-swimming. You may not do all these things in any one week, but when a Thursday gets long, by default you can plan to rent a movie (of course, at the beginning of the summer you assigned a rotation so you know automatically who gets to choose the movie "this time", thus saving pain, fighting, and pouting).

4) Finally, try to bring your "current" projects to a stopping place, not necessary done, but at a place where they can be put away until next Fall. Remember, this is supposed to be a sort of "vacation" time for you, too. When I come to my stopping place, I often make written instructions to myself about where to start next and where I am storing additional items which belong to this project. I put everything away and make a note on next September's calendar to consider this project again.

5) Summers are just so important! Your influence, patience and attention to your children's needs is the best gift you can give them. Take them some places, read to them lots, and just sit on the lawn with them under the rain of a sprinkler. You will enjoy your summer more and they will feel good, too. You are learning some, working some, and playing some.

I wish you good luck as you approach this summer. Don't try to do too much, but do try to over-plan, over-decide, and over-assign as you begin. Simplify, clarify and focus! Start out with some semblance of control and it will be a better summer. For sure!

I helped an ill friend recently with her housecleaning and I have come away with three ideas to "ease your pain" as a homemaker: three essentials which save so much time, trouble, and hassle. Do you have these habits established in your home?

1) Each and every person that lives in the home turns their clothes right side out before depositing them in the laundry basket. This includes: shirts, pants, underwear, and socks. When I began the laundry for my friend last week, I faced mounds of rolled up socks, inside-out underwear (somehow it is easier to turn it if is your own), and shirts which were just pulled off every which way (meaning arms were half way inside-out and sometimes the whole shirt). It was unfathomable to me. Just a moment by each person in the family would save many minutes at the washer. Can everyone help? Yes, everyone! (Even stubborn teenagers and a reluctant spouse.) And if they don't? Once you have established the rule and given ample time for training (one day's laundry should be sufficient) wash only those things which are turned right side out. It will be painful for a week or two, but soon everyone will get the point. THE LAUNDRESS has enough to do without turning dirty clothes the right way for laundry.

2) Each and every person that lives in the home cleans up after themselves when they use the bathroom (especially in the morning before leaving for work and school). This means putting away their toothbrush, toothpaste, shaver, brushes, combs, hair clips, and hair elastics when they are done. This small hassle will benefit everyone that comes into the bathroom later. When I was helping, I was astounded to find hair clips and hair elastics all over, toothbrushes on the counters, and toothpaste tubes not far away. Even small children can learn to put away what they get out, especially in the most commonly-used room in the house. Teenagers should not be allowed to leave their messes in public domain. Neither should adults. It is just common courtesy to kindly clean up after yourself in the bathroom. Establish the new habit by rewarding generously those to clean up after themselves for one day, then for two straight days, then for a week according to your personal situation. Gather leftovers from the morning mess each day with a promise to give them back for a "small" job done by the offender. The job can be more symbolic than difficult; it won't take long for the offender to understand the need to help. (One friend asked her offending teenager to sing a simple song to get back his items. After two days of this ritual, his items were never left again on the bathroom counters.) Again, look for fun ways to encourage change!

3) Each and every person that lives in the home empties their glass of its contents and scraps their plate into the wastebasket or disposal when they are done with a meal. Then, as circumstances allow, they might also put their dishes in the dishwasher or the sink. As I emptied half-full glasses of milk and cleaned up spaghetti, dried and mounded on a dozen plates, I wondered at the situation. If everyone had done just a little bit, the my job would have be minimized and my task much nicer to contemplate. Help your family members to see that their small part makes for a big change! (A day or two helping with the dishes, by those who leave with their own dishes "undone", will help mightily!)

Now, I know that real life isn't quite as easy as 1-2-3, but I also know that a little training now, in the little things, will "ease the pain" forever for your family. Implement these small changes, one at a time over the next week or two, and you will be astounded how much time, frustration, and emotional drain will be eliminated! Train, follow-up on those who don't respond to the challenge, reward generously those who cooperate, and soon your house will be running smoother than ever.

If you have comments or suggestions about other "small" habits which reward the homemaker's life and "ease her pain", please contact me: houseoforder@gmail.com and I will address them another time.

One challenge in many homes is knowing when something has been done the right way. Often, especially when the home contains more than one person, there is "your" way, "my" way, and (somewhere in between) the "right" way. Conflict often occurs when one person reviews what has been done and determines it hasn't been done the "right" way (which is really his or her interpretation of "my" way). This may happen when the bathroom is used for a shower or bath, the dishes are done, or even when someone comes home from work and school.

Let's talk about one common conflict in apartments, condos, and homes: Coming home from school or work. Usually the person coming in the door has his or her hands full of items. It might be purchases from errands run on the way home, a coat worn because of the rain, today's mail, or a backpack and papers from school. Depending upon the individual, there might be items strewn from the front door clear to their bedroom door as the individual "unloads". Sometimes it is left this way for some time. Some people unload everything on the kitchen counter and walk away, others might make it to the bedroom, unload everything on the bed, and then leave. Whatever is done by one individual will usually be contrast to another's more expedient way of coming "home". You see, the first person is "home" as soon as they have unloaded on the most convenient surface. Picking up and putting the items away is not part of coming home for them. For the second person, coming "home" begins with putting the items down to free their arms, but doesn't end until the mail is put in individual mail slots, the purchases are stored in their proper place in the cupboard, and the coat is hung up in the closet.

When these two individuals live together, there will always be someone unhappy. Either the second individual cleans up after the first, which causes conflict. Of, the second person doesn't clean up the after the first, which still causes conflict. So, if this is an issue in your home, decide what the standards will be, decide what the timing will be, and then set the consequences.

I will share an example. Tom and Julia have been married for two years. They both work full time. She comes home about an hour after he does. Whenever she walks in the door she can tell if he is home because the errand list is on the kitchen counter, the purchases are on the kitchen table, his coat is on the couch, and the mail is half read on the end table. Wow! What a challenge!

Carrie and Joel have a different problem. They have been married for just a couple of months. He comes in after her from school. She comes home from work and walks straight to their bed where she unloads. He is glad the front room is always presentable for company, but can't find his way through his bedroom because there is today's mess, yesterday's mess, and last week's mess here and there in piles around their bed as the each day's stacks are moved from the bed to the floor and stay there.

Can these challenges be solved? If so, how? Setting standards! Yes, sitting down, reviewing the item in question, and deciding as a couple, as roommates, or as a family what are the acceptable standards will be for that job. It is helpful to examine the most workable solutions considering the situation, letting each party fully express their opinion. As conclusions are reached, remember that setting standards includes 1) WHAT WILL BE DONE, 2) WHEN IT WILL BE DONE, and 3) WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF IT ISN'T DONE. The standards which will be used can be WRITTEN down and POSTED for convenient review whenever that " job" needs to be done again. You see, when WRITTEN standards are set, then there is less conflict because everyone knows the rules of the game. While this will be a give and take situation between adults, it can be a positive learning experience for children as they live with consequences they agreed to beforehand.

So, what is to be done? Talk, decide, set standards, set timing, set consequences, and WRITE IT ALL down. Just for fun, may I share what Tom and Julia decided:

Tom: I will usually be the first one home. I will hang up my coat in the closet. I will put the mail in the basket on the end table after I have read it for Julia's perusal and to keep the room neat. Then, before she gets home, I will also put away my purchases away so her first view of our apartment will one of order. If Julia comes home and there is a mess, she will simply say, "Tomahawk", my first reminder. Then, if I don't clean up right away, I will do the dishes for her that night.

Julia: I will be the second home on most nights. I will not complain about Tom's mess (if he has left one). I will just make sure I have clean up myself, softly say "Tomahawk" in his ear, fix dinner, and then get the night off from the dishes if he hasn't cleaned up.

I know you are thinking this is somewhat elementary. Most conflict resolution is. But if a couple, or roommates, or a family are to get things done the "right" way, they must set effective standards, clarifying WHAT IS TO BE DONE, WHEN IT IS TO BE DONE, and WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF IT ISN'T. To tell the rest of the story, about one week into this new "coming home" standard, Tom was very much ready to put his items away as soon as he returned home. He had already done the dishes three times too many!

So look at your family life, pick something which seems to cause constant conflict and have a meeting. Describe the problem, suggest solutions, let everyone give their input, set standards, timing, and consequences. WRITE everything down! Then watch the magic happen! You will be amazed at the changes which are possible as you implement "THE RIGHT WAY" standards into your own family life.

I broke my shoelace this past week. As usual, I pulled some of the good shoelace through a bit, tied a square knot, and decided it would have to do “for now”. Of course, in the back of my mind I knew the knot would annoy me with those ends poking up and out, the shoelace was now too short to tie comfortably, and it was likely to break again soon. But, well, it is how I face life sometimes: leave it for later.

But is this the best way? How many things in your life are un-repaired, half-repaired, or need replacing? Plastic weakens and tears, carpets fray, paint peels, and shoelaces eventually break. They always have, they always will. What can be done to get your life more in order and to have fewer items which need your "repair/replacement" consideration?

May I suggest a new way to live? A better way? (Of course, I will have to implement this in my own life more fully, too.)

1) Keep an ongoing written list of items which need your attention. Begin this list by walking around your home, poking around your garage, and taking a stroll through your yard. Note everything that needs repair or replacement. Then go back to your other priorities for today. As you notice other items which need replacing or repairing, whether you are on your way out the door, are in the middle of another project, or just too weary to think about it right away, take the time to add these items to your “REPAIR/REPLACE IT” list.

Then, choose a regular time (we usually do this as part of our Saturday afternoon routine), approach each of the repair jobs, decide what to do, make a “mini” list of steps to complete the job, and begin.

Sometimes this will mean a trip to the store. If you aren’t going out just at the moment, add the needed repair item to your regular errands list. Put any parts which you will need for comparison in your vehicle or note needed measurements. Buy the repair items this upcoming week and plan to finish the repair next Saturday.

2) When you replace anything, consider buying two instead of one. Need new shoelaces, get an extra pair. When you replace your watch battery, get an extra one. When you purchase night light bulbs, buy a few extras. Have a “spares” box for these items. One of the reasons we “live” with broken tools and trinkets is because the trouble of a trip to the store dissuades us from doing it right, right now.

3) Make up a clothing mending kit. In it have a pair of scissors, needles, sundry buttons, safety pins of assorted sizes, and various colored threads. Duplicate tools if necessary so that everything needed to make a small clothing mend is right in the kit. Remember, the more convenient you make it, the more likely it is you’ll repair it.

Have a regular “mending” container where members of your family can put items which need attention. This container could be near the phone, so that when a good friends calls, you can multi-task.

Of course, when children are young, you will do most of this mending yourself, but as soon as they begin to write well they can learn to mend. Teach them, slowly and carefully, and then let them begin to make their own mends. If it is a hole in their sock, an unraveling in their sweatshirt, or a seam that is opening, teach them to repair. Not only will you save a lot of money, they will learn invaluable skills. At first their mends won’t be pretty, but with practice and patience, your children can mend their own small holes and you will be left with time to face more major repairs.

4) In a sturdy container, keep various kinds of glue, a glue gun, and several small clamps and rubber bands. Include glues which will attach anything to anything, paper glues, wood glues, and plastic glues. Having the necessary glues around will make the “fix-it” person more likely to approach the repair.

5) Remember, it is usually easier and faster to repair it earlier than later. This was poignantly pointed out to me when I failed to patch a small, broken seam in my hall carpet. Week after week I noticed that small opening and ignored it. Then one day, one of my children pulled a toy over the opening. Something caught, and the small opening became a “you cannot ignore this” rip.

So, for a minute today, think about your life. Make a list of needed repairs, half-repaired items, or items which need replacing. Plan a day and time to tackle your list and feel the freedom of “it is fixed”! With this better approach to life, it will be much smoother sailing and far fewer broken shoelaces!

I have struggled for years with a malady I call "Monday Morning Madness". Maybe you do, too! You see, somehow if Monday morning goes really well, the rest of the week seems to go just as well. Of course, in your mind, you are going to get everything done (that is important and essential to be done this next week) ASAP. But have an unavoidable repair, an unexpected interruption, or just one or two things out of routine right at the beginning of the week and the day (and sometimes the whole week) seems to fall apart.

So, how do you conquer this challenge which besets you every Monday morning? I have learned four skills which relieve the stress, dampen the depression, and can keep you going and going:

1) Make a list! More than any other single stress reliever, I believe that making up a list of what's on your mind is essential to your success. This is usually done on Sunday evening. The list will be sometimes be long and frustratingly difficult. No matter, write everything down that is bugging you and needs attention.

2) Set priorities! Weight each item on your list according to importance. Use the A, B, C system. If it is essential, it gets an "A". If it is important, it gets a "B". If it would be nice to have done, it gets a "C".

3) Set some logical pacing! Now, with your revised, prioritized list in hand, review the scheduling needs this week will present to you. Decide which day and time you would best address each "A" item. When you are running errands on Thursday, could you add two "A" items to your list and make just one trip? Can you read that "A" article while you wait for piano lessons to be done this Wednesday? Can you have someone help with that "A" repair on Saturday morning (after you have had a good, hot breakfast together)?

Add "B" items to each day's schedule as appropriate, to be done ONLY IF TIME ALLOWS. Put the "C" items at the bottom of your daily schedule to be tackled only if PLENTY of extra time allows or someone kindly asks you how they can help. In other words, first focus on your regularly weekly responsibilities, then work on the "A's", then the "B's" and sometimes the "C's". Remember, always do the most important things first.

4) Leave time for the inevitable! Sometimes, just as you have everything set and ready to go, you will climb into your vehicle only to find you have a flat tire. Such challenges are distressing at best, but you have to know that every day (for the rest of your entire life) there will probably be some challenge, some repair, or some problem to be solved. Plan for it. Schedule it in. (Of course, keep a "B" and a "C" item or two ready to slip into that time slot should you have a really, really smooth day.)

3) Stop and rest before you run out of energy! You can work and work until you are past weariness. This is not wise! It makes you cranky, sometimes means a burnt dinner, and often means an unhappy family (funny how they seem to act just about as happy as you do). Listen to your body and stop before you run out of energy. Take just for a minute, regroup, and get a grip. If you don't, it takes much longer to renew yourself enough to finish out the day.

So, now that we have the methods down, let's try to have a better week. First list, then prioritize, then pace, plan for the inevitable, and finally, keep track of your own energy level. Remember, Monday mornings are going to come every week. Let's plan first and then go to work, keeping a smile on our face and that A,B,C list close at hand.

Kitchen pantries can be a wonderful boon to your homemaking experience or they can be a repetitive nightmare. You may be blessed with ample room, plenty of shelf space, and lots of shelves that are just the right height. Or, you may be maintaining a pantry in the end cupboard of your small apartment kitchen. No matter your circumstances, there are certain principles which will make your pantry work better each and every day.

1) In the near future (hopefully sometime this week), set aside an hour or so to organize your pantry. This should be a time with minimal interruptions, no answered phone calls, no TV, and no visitors (unless you have a good neighbor who is even better at organizing than you and is willing to help).

Clear and wipe off your kitchen counters and table, if necessary. Pull everything out of the pantry (yes, everything) and place in stacks on your kitchen counters and table. Group items of similar types together as much as possible: the cold cereal, the chips, the canned goods, the pastas, the bottles, and the soda cans.

2) Wipe down all the pantry shelving, top to bottom. Sweep and wipe up the floor. If you are going to all the trouble to have an "organized" pantry, might as well have a clean one, too.

4) However, even as you are returning items to the pantry, as much as possible understand two further principles.

Finally, save certain areas of your pantry (mostly shelves which are easily reached by most family members) for the "in and out" items. These are foods which are retrieved every day: cold cereal, chips for school lunches, and afternoon snacks. In other words, have areas which are available for these foods whether or not they are currently in the pantry. This allows you to easily fill these areas up when you return from grocery shopping. You may even want to label the shelves: cold cereal, lunch foods, afternoon snacks.

I know that it sounds like a lot of wasted space, but the trouble with over-stuffed pantries is you have to remove half of the stuff to get at what you want. That just doesn’t work for the harried cook. She or he needs to get what they want conveniently. It is better to "under" store and make retrieving items more convenient than to "over" store and make it a constant mess to even get into the pantry.

Now, it is important to understand that a pantry is a high-maintenance creature. If you neglect it, it will come back to haunt you, every time you open the door. So, set up a maintenance schedule and stick to it. Many homemakers find that a quick "spiff up" before they go grocery shopping each week works well. You not only see what needs replenishing, you can bring order to the pantry again. This will allow it to give the best and most convenient use.

Some day they will built all kitchens with adequate and roomy pantries, but for now, no matter your pantry situation, give it a cleanout, reorder the items as you return them, and see what a wonderful difference it makes in your "kitchen" life!

I don't know about you, but I hate to wait. I don't like waiting at traffic lights, standing in checkout lines at the store, or waiting at the bank. Dentist and doctor's office waits can be annoying as can the last few minutes before your spouse walks in the door from work. How do you reduce "wasted" time and how do you more profitably use your time when you're powerless to do anything but wait and wait and wait?

First, look for ways to reduce "waiting" time. For instance, going early in the day to do errands usually reduces the amount of time you will have to wait in line. The bank, the post office, and the grocery store are all rather empty and you will breeze through your errand list with less time and trouble.

Second, try to do as much "shopping" by phone as possible. Call ahead to see if that video you want to rent is available and can be held at the front desk; call to see if the item you desire to buy is in stock at the hardware store. Buy your stamps by mail whenever possible. Arrange for pickup and delivery by any company that offers that service without charge.

Third, whenever you make an appointment, say at the doctor's or dentist, ask for the first appointment in the morning or the first in the afternoon. While this doesn't completely insure timeliness on the part of your dentist or doctor, it improves your chances. As a matter of fact, make life even easier by calling before you leave to make sure they are on schedule. It is nicer to wait where you are, finishing up here or there, than to be sitting a waiting room.

If you have done all you can to avoid waiting and still find yourself "on hold", how can you use that time profitably? May I suggest three different activities which can greatly increase profitability?

1) Carry reading materials of some sort with you at all times. My favorites, of course, are paperbacks about home organization or ones that share homemaking hints. I learn a great deal during those small waiting minutes because I am prepared to open, read, and learn. I have a red pen handy for noting items which I wish to implement into my own schedule. There is a paperback in each of my vehicles, and one in my purse. When I am going to be children, I carry "read aloud" books for them and use this time to share a story. Sometimes, I will have other children in the waiting room gather around to occupy their minds. The time goes so fast when a story is being told.

2) Have a small kit consisting of stationery, pen, and envelopes. So many thank you notes, birthday wishes, and congratulations can be completed for mailing during the minutes waiting for an appointment.

3) If you have intermittent waits in lines or in traffic, may I suggest that you begin a memorization program. Initially, pick four or five short sayings which you feel might benefit your life, some from the scriptures and others from wise leaders, and write them up on 3" x 5" cards. Begin putting them to memory during your "wasted" time. Tuck them behind the visor in your vehicle or in your wallet. These sayings can benefit our life immediately and can also be shared with others (particularly unruly children) when they need to be occupied. You can learn or you can teach, all during time which was previously wasted. There is nothing more compelling to a child or teenager than the challenge of learning something someone they admire already knows.

There are a dozen other ways to be prepared for using wasted time profitably. Do you knit? Crochet? Can you teach one of your children these skills during those repetitive orthodontist visits? Do you have a regular waiting time with some of your family while another is finishing up piano or dance lessons? Can you teach them or read to them? As you look at your life, prepare to never be without something to do yourself or to teach and share.

Have a good week. Look for your "wasted" time pockets. First, try to reduce or eliminate them. Then prepare to use them profitably. You will find your life will fill with more feelings of accomplishment and your frustrations will reduce considerably. See you next week!

First Week of March - From Daffodils to Duffel Bags! It is Never Too Early for a List

I don't really want to say it and maybe you don't want to hear it, but a Spring is almost here. I saw my first daffodil beaming low from the ground yesterday and I knew it was time to stop, evaluate, and plan. You see, it is the first week of March. If we don't take a moment right away and look at the next three months, things are going to get out quickly of hand.

So get out a current calendar and get a feel from the shape, size, and pattern of the next three months. Four possible major events are in the wind: Spring Vacation, Easter, Memorial Day, and Summer.

Then take four pieces of lined paper and entitle them EASTER, SPRING VACATION, MEMORIAL DAY, and SUMMER. Fold each of them in half one way and then in half the other way. Title each section of the upper halves of the paper: Questions, Answers. Title each section of the lower halves of the paper: Things to do, Things to buy. Without much thought, "questions & answers" and "things to do & buy" will fill your mind.

For example: Will you be celebrating Easter this year? If so, how? Will you be traveling? Will you need to fill Easter baskets for some treasured children? Do you need to invite someone to spend that weekend with you? What will you do on Saturday? How will you spend Sunday? As questions come into your mind, WRITE THEM DOWN, making a list with generous space between each question down the left side of the EASTER page. Then try to ANSWER EACH OF THE QUESTIONS (as best as you can at this early date) down the right side of the page. Then at the bottom of the page, make up a preliminary TO DO and TO BUY list.

Just as you have prepared an Easter sheet, do the same for other upcoming events. Do you need to buy new duffel bags for summer camping? (Maybe you can add that to your errands list this week.) Where will you be going for your vacation? (Maybe it is time to discuss this with your spouse and/or your children.) On and on the items go.

With your "lists" in hand, you can note down questions, answers, and items needing attention at your convenience. If you have a planner, you may want to blank planner sheets. If you work better from your frig, put these papers on the front of them for the next few days to evaluate your desires and make plans. You will be surprised how quickly and easily you begin to use extra, idle moments to make notations. With these simple lists, you can begin to consolidate plans and focus your attentions for a successful Spring season.

The pattern is always the same. Start early to plan, make initial lists to get your mind rolling, and then put items of action into your regular routine. This year can be different, less stressful, and more fulfilling. Just start now and begin the magic of being early, relaxed, and on top of things.

P.S. You may want to do this "Stop, Evaluate, and Plan" about every quarter. You will do it again at the beginning of summer, at the beginning of the next school year, at the beginning of the holiday season. Then the whole year can be different for you!

When I spoke to a group of women recently, they were curious about own personal homemaking habits. Did I regularly get up early? Did I have an organized house ALL THE TIME? Did I always look nicely dressed?

Well, to tell you the truth, someone long ago gave me three keys to having a good day. When I can apply these keys, my whole day seems to be better.

1) Get dressed when you get up and if you are going to get dressed, dress up. In other words, dress for the day, and dress just one step above your mood. This has simplified many a busy day for me and made me feel better about myself during many a difficult hour.

2) Always neat your environment before you tackle anything else. This has helped me want to get to my work because my desk, my kitchen, and my laundry room are pleasant to be in.

3) And yes, I try to get up before the rest of the family. As someone once said to me, “Fifteen minutes alone in the morning is worth a whole hour of time with everyone up.” It is true for me. Does it work the same for you?

Getting others in your "home" (which might be anything from a trailer to a large and comfortable house) to help with the housework can be difficult at times. In fact, sometimes it seems so impossible that you just as well do it yourself and be done with it, instead of struggling with the emotional trauma of others' resistance. My own experience has led me to identify four distinct personalities when it comes to getting the chores done (sometimes one person can have multiple personalities).

Can you identify with the following types? They include the sheriff (one who insists that everything be fair, completely and unalterably fair or they won't be cooperative), the slacker (he or she doesn't like to start, works slowly and without distinction, and often has a hard time finishing), the scrimper (who gets to the job all right but hides plenty of things under the bed or behind the door, wipes but doesn't clean, straightens but doesn't really do a good job), and the complainer (who has many ways to state his point but always is whining, giving excuses, and/or mumbling).

As homemakers, what can we do to reduce or eliminate the strength of these personalities in our homes? May I suggest four ways to get past the problems.

1) Designate the Job Title. This is the easiest task: Clean the bathroom! Wash the dishes! Take out the trash! Print the title of each job at the top of separate index cards in bold letters.

2) Detail the Job Duties. This is a bit more complicated because different people have different standards. For instance, in your family, your spouse may think that cleaning the bathroom includes putting down the toilet lid, straightening the towels, and shutting all the doors.

On the other hand you may include cleaning the mirrors, washing out the sink and wiping down the counters, scrubbing the tub/shower, shaking the rug, sweeping the floor, emptying the wastebasket, wiping down the floor, and returning the rug to its place...

On the same index card which is entitled CLEAN THE BATHROOM, list what you mutually agree (as a family) will be the standards for cleaning the bathroom. These jobs are usually listed in the order of their sequence. Remember, you start at the top and work down, begin the cleanest place in the room and on to the dirtiest. Be as detailed as possible so there will be no latent misunderstandings down the line. When the card is completed, make sure that all involved parties again agree to the standards which have been set.

3) Delegate the Jobs. This, of course, brings out the sheriff in your household personalities. But work through the parameters which best meet the circumstances of your home. Make sure that everyone is responsible for something every day, that everyone understands how long they will be doing their particular jobs, and then review one last time both the job titles and the details of the job duties.

4) Delight in Motivating. Spouses, children, roommates, and family usually don't enjoy doing housework unless there is a motivation to keep it fun, to offer a reward, or to have an activity afterwards which will compensate for the "pain" of these responsibilities. It is important to understand the importance of motivation and seek for ways which will work well in your home. You can use charts for youngsters (but they soon seem to lose interest), you can offer rewards (which seems to work well for children who love to play with friends, watch a video, or read a book), or you can promise a treat (we will go the park when the Saturday housework is done, have a barbecue for all those who do their jobs well for one week, get an ice cream cone for all those who have been cooperative and not complained for one whole day). Whatever works, seek for answers to make working a game, and a fun one at that.

By using this extensive and somewhat lengthy process at the beginning of your housework, you will keep the sheriff happy, you will help the slacker have definite reasons to get going, you will clarify issues for the scrimper, and you will keep the complainer at bay (he or she probably won't stop whining completely, but it will minimize the challenges significantly as others get rewards and praise).

Good luck this week. Buy a set of lined index cards the next time you are at the store, set your "family cleaning" standards, and promote a feeling of "work well done is expected in this home". If time is a constraining issue for you, there are pre-made "Housecleaning Plan" packet cards and "Teaching Children to Work" packet cards for your convenience in getting started.

Our lives can be so chaotic at times. We feel rushed as we go through our days and seem to have more pressures than we can easily handle. It is hurry here, and hurry there. And don't forget the diaper bag, this time, please!

One place of strength you can find, however, is what my kind husband calls the "Ricks' Law of Leaving". Long ago he discovered that "leaving" is an art which must be carefully orchestrated if a family is to avoid being rushed, tense, and VERY uptight by the time all the family members get into the vehicle and on their way.

Three items needs consideration: 1) The age and nature of the family members. 2) How much time it will take the family, once they reach their destination, to get from the vehicle to where they are expected (i.e., it takes some time to get the stroller out, the baby strapped in, and to walk the family into church). 3) The traffic which can be expected as you travel.

Let's look at the first of these challenges and figure out some principles of action which can calm the "hurry" syndrome right out of our lives.

If we are to be logical about it, babies take 20 minutes to get ready to leave (including dressing, diaper changing, and diaper bag preparation), children each take 5 minutes (if you don't have a habitual problem with shoe disappearance), teenagers take 10 minutes minimum (because this is one point of leverage which they tend to take advantage of if they are at a cantankerous stage), and parents take 15 minutes (because not only do they need to prepare themselves, there are usually other items which need stowing in the vehicle, wallets and money to collect, and etc).

That means that a family of four children needs to start getting ready to leave about 35 minutes before they want to walk out the door (fifteen minutes for the parents, plus 5 minutes each for the children = 15+5+5+5+5). Seems almost impossible to believe until you begin timing yourself. But is it true. It really does alot of time to get a family into the car!

A family with a baby and three young children will need 15+20+5+5+5 or 50 minutes. A family with more than four children will almost need to work diligently together to get in the car without an hour's preparation. While practice will help reduce this time, family members will have to help one another. This can be most easily accomplished if older children are assigned a specific younger child to get ready.

While a couple with only one baby can get things ready in about 35 minutes (15+20), they would do well to keep up their skills, because each new child that comes into the family can length the "Law of Leaving" considerably.

So what is your "Law of Leaving" quota? If you really walked through it, how much sooner should you be getting ready for church, or to visit Grandma, or to go to the show? We all have friends that are always early. We have others that are always late. If we were to investigate, the difference is in their application of the "Law of Leaving" .

Have a good week! First calculate about how many minutes late your family seems to be when traveling. Adjust your "beginning" time accordingly. Change within your family will probably not happen immediately, even if you could convince everyone you need to be getting ready to leave earlier. So initiate change by getting yourself ready first (nice and early); then get the vehicle packed with whatever is needed. From there, start with the oldest child and work down. The younger the child, the more likely they are to undress and take off their shoes before you get in the car.

It is helpful to have incentives for the child that can get ready the fastest, the teenage that is cooperative, the spouse to goes the extra mile. You know what I mean! No one does anything unless there is a good reason. Make it pleasurable to get in the car and you will soon have the whole family up and helping get you on your way. See you next week!

My mom called them garbage cans; my dad called them trash cans. My husband calls them wastebaskets, but whatever you call them, they are wonderful additions to ALL the rooms in your home.

1) Have a wastebasket in every room in the house. It will make discarding more convenient. And when something is convenient, it tends to get done. I am helping a woman who struggles with order in her bedroom, the only room in her shared duplex which she can call her own. As we worked through the stacks and stacks of clothing, papers, and other articles lining her walls and floor, it occurred to me there was no wastebasket in her bedroom. She had trash tucked behind this bookshelf, stuffed under her bed, or stacked on the already full desk. The nearest wastebasket was in the nearby bathroom and it was much too small (you know the popular kind that are short and beautiful but can’t hold much more than a q-tip and a single piece of kleenex). I encouraged her to buy a reasonably tall, quite large plastic wastebasket. You may want to do the same for all the rooms in your domicile. Each and every room needs its own wastebasket, the bigger the better. (Of course, when you have young children, these wastebaskets will need to find homes up and away from their curious fingers. Otherwise, you will spend hours....well, you know how it can go when a child find a wastebasket.)

2) All household wastebaskets should be big enough to hold a week’s trash (except for the kitchen wastebaskets). They should be easy to maintain. If possible, make sure these wastebaskets are sturdy and neutral in color (avoid buying white because they look dirty almost immediately). As a good friend once commented to me, "Marie, you like to buy things that already look dirty so they don’t look dirty when they get that way." What she meant was that buying darker versus lighter keeps things from looking dirty nearly as quickly. Someday, I hope to find plastic wastebaskets with a light pattern which will all but cover most dirt.

3) The kitchen wastebaskets need to hold at least one day’s trash. An innovative homemaker, with a large family, actually has two kitchen wastebaskets, one for "dry" items (i.e. cereal boxes, capped and empty gallon milk jugs, the daily junk mail) and another for "wet" items (empty soup cans, orange peels, egg shells, etc.). She lines the "wet" wastebasket but doesn’t the "dry". She keeps these wastebaskets out and convenient in her kitchen. Her best worker is in charge of emptying these two wastebaskets daily because she tends to throw away more when the baskets are begging to be filled up again.

4) Make it easy to empty household trash into the exterior garbage can. Some families move the "street" garbage can to the inside of their garage during the cold winter months to keep it from freezing shut and getting snowed upon. Another homemaker offers extra incentives to her children for emptying the trash to the outside receptacle without being asked. She says it has become the most popular afternoon chore in the house since she began sharing gum drops with willing participants.

5) Have a semi-annual wastebasket cleanout on a sunny day. Take all the plastic wastebaskets to the back lawn or patio area, spray them down, soak them full of soapy water for 20 minutes or so, and scrub them with a brush. Tip the water out onto a safe place, let them sit in the sun for a few minutes, and then wipe them dry and return them to their "homes". There is nothing like looking at the bottom of a wastebasket and not grimacing with wonder at what is stuck down there.

So, have a wonderful wastebasket week! The secrets: Have a wastebasket in every room, make sure they are big enough to do their job well, make it easy to get the trash from wastebaskets to the exterior garbage can, and deep-clean your baskets occasionally to help them serve you better.

Good luck this week. You will find that these secrets are well worth the time and trouble to implement in your own home. See you next week!

In addition to last week's hint, another way to save lots of time is having an extra of everything in your house. This will happen naturally as you incorporate the habit of "Need One, Buy Two" which we have just talked about, but once you have gotten your precious items home, do yourself and your whole family a favor by using rubber band babies.

"Rubber Band Babies" are the last of any item in your home. It is the last bottle of catsup, the last container of aspirin, and the last jar of cream. These items are designated by putting a rubber band around them. Then, when you get this item out of the cupboard, it being the last one, you will immediately be reminded to add it to your written grocery/errands shopping list.

So, add "rubber bands" to your shopping list for this week and have a "Rubber Band Baby" party. Go through each and every one of your cupboards. Put a rubber band on the last of each item you have stored. You will probably discover that you have an item here and there of which you only have one. Put a rubber band on it, anyway, and add this item to your shopping list immediately. Remember, always be thinking: "Need One, Buy Two"....three, four, or more.

So if you care about saving time, keep a spare of everything. This is your next time-savings goal: always have a spare on hand, always! Using rubber bands is an easy system which even the youngest member of your household can understand.

"Mom, I just pulled out a '"Rubber Band Baby'!" will be a comment which will ring in your ears with comfort and consolation. You can add the item to your shopping list now and take care of repurchasing it when you regularly go shopping again. No more emergency trips to the store. You are one step ahead of the game. So if you care, remember.....keep a spare.

4th Week of January - Working Smarter, Not Harder .... Especially When it Comes to Running Errands!

I run errands alot. I am sure you do, too! For me, there are three problems: 1) I get somewhere and don't have what I need to finish an errand . 2) I get somewhere and wish I had a piece of information or an item to do a "nearby" errand. 3) I complete my errands and am heading home when I remember that I have forgotten an errand. So, what can be done? Let's stop and work through some possibilities that will solve these problems forever.

1) Always put whatever you need to complete your errands in your vehicle as soon as you think about the errand. Need to drop something off at the dry cleaners, put it in the back of your vehicle, NOW! Need to return an item, put it in the vehicle, NOW! Need to drop something off at a friend's house, put it in the vehicle, NOW! I have a small plastic container in the back of my van for my "returns". It keeps them confined and easy to retrieve.

Then add this errand to your "errands" list. I keep my list on a folded sheet of 8-1/2" x 11" paper which I have attached to a "half" clipboard, a newly-discovered tool I purchased at my supercenter store in the stationery section. It was $.99 and is one of the best recent investments I have made because it keeps my "errands" list safe as I shuffle papers around. Now it is "attached" to something sturdy and I can find it easily. Email me for more details, if you like.

2) I have learned to keep several 3" x 5" cards in the outside pocket of my wallet upon which I write needed items to buy as soon as I think about it. For instance, I have a card for the hardware store, the variety store, and the nearby strip mall (dry cleaners, post office, and shoe repair). When I think of something I need, I write it on the appropriate cards. Then when I am at the variety store and realize I am near a hardware store, I can pull out my "hardware store" card, see that I need to buy a can of putty for repairing some holes, and can stop there without much ado.

3) Never leave the house to do errands without a written list of the places to stop, the errands to be done at each stop, and the sequence. I usually make up my list at little bit here and little bit there as I think about it. If I don't write it down when it comes through my neurons, it won't get remembered later. That I know about myself. I space this list generously on my paper, leaving room between each item for details which I might add later. Then as I think of the details, I add them in this empty space. I also circle items which I will need to take with me. This acts as a second reminder in case I have forgotten to put the item in the car. Just as I am preparing to go, I number my errands: #1, #2, etc.

Finally, I have learned to get ready to run my errands several hours before I actually leave (which means sometimes doing it the night before because I leave early in the morning). I do this errands preparation "early" because I have found that the worst time to be thinking about anything is when you are getting ready to go. You are usually rushed, have several interruptions from family members which makes cognitive thinking impossible, and are running late which means you don't have time to stop and think and do it right. So, prepare for all errands "early".

Have a good last week of January. Try these new "errands" techniques and see if things don't go a bit better for you. If you have other ideas to share with me, please feel free to write. I can learn from you, too!

3rd Week of January - Have You Finished up Last Year Yet? If Not, Its Time to Put that Old Year Away!

It's the third week in January. If you're like me, you have finally gotten your Christmas tree and decorations put away, you have settled into a semi-normal routine for the new year, and yet you feel unsettled about having completely finished up the old year in order to surge ahead into the commitments and challenges of the new year.

So, sometime this week, take a minute and make sure you are really done with last year. How?

1) Take down and file or discard all last year's calendars, both in your home and at your work place. Replace them with new current calendars. This means the wall calendar, the planner calendars, and those small ones you keep here and there to conveniently check on the date.

2) Put an updated checkbook register in your wallet with the current year's calendar. Because its a reference point so often when you are out and about, its both embarrassing and frustrating to have old information. Many banks will gladly mail you a current checkbook register if yours has grown outdated.

3) Prepare a new current year's Tax File folder and place it in your home office desk so you have a convenient place to put all this kind of paperwork throughout the new year. Do the same at your office (if you work outside the home) so you can have a temporary "home" for those personal documents which need saving but come into your hands when you're not at home.

4) Ask yourself where you might like to have another calendar or two in your life! When I did that mental exercise, I found I was really missing a small calendar right at my computer console to give me a feel for future dates. I also wanted to have one on my frig so when I was cooking and thinking I could refer to it easily. I also placed one near each phone in our home. I can't believe how many times I am in need of correct dates while I am conversing.God luck! The new year is well on its way. Make sure you have wrapped up

I always get a bit lost by the second week of January. The firm resolutions which I had settled on seem to be slipping away and I wake up the same old person as before with less and less desire to keep to the commitments which I so recently made.

How do you hold on to new habits which seem sure to change your life for the better? Three steps will help insure success...

1) Have several visual reminders to keep you on track. (I hate to say it, but we get very easily distracted in the midst of everyday responsibilities.) 2) Have a specific IF-THEN response to help remind you of your commitments. (Nothing like a game to keep you interested.) 3) Tell someone important to you (and that you trust not to make fun of your "bad" days) about your new goals and encourage their involvement in your change.

Let me share an example. One of my students desperately wanted to get her laundry under control. It was always the last thing she thought about doing and was often postponed until there was no clean underwear anywhere in the house, at which time, of course, she got angry at herself for slacking off and did a marathon laundry. At the end of last year we talked of ways to make the new year one of "Laundry Heaven". After learning about the three steps to success, she settled upon the following:

1) I will put my shoes on the washer when I go to bed. When I get dressed in the morning, I will have to go to the laundry room to complete that process, thus reminding me to get a batch of laundry going. I will also make up a note for my bathroom mirror which says, "Have you done the laundry yet?" which will be a back-up reminder.

2) I will not eat breakfast until the first batch is in the dryer. In other words, IF the wash has made it to the dryer, THEN I can eat breakfast.

3) I will report my laundry progress every day to my oldest daughter (who has suffered the most from wearing two-day old underwear and has the most interest in my change). This will work great, because my daughter will very encouraging at the slightest progress I make.

Now, it has only been eight days since Marilyn (name changed to insure privacy) began her new "Laundry Heaven" program, but when we talked yesterday, she was delighted at her progress. "I can do it, I really can!" she said. You can, too!

So, return to your New Year's Resolution list. Pick one item and resolve on three steps of success. Write up severalc small notes to put here and there as reminders. Decide upon an IF-THEN response. Get someone to encourage and prompt you on your way. Soon your laundry will be done, or you will exercise every day, or you will get dressed first thing in the morning, or any other small, but important New Year's resolution you have set will become a firm habit to enhance your life.

Good luck! Please write me an email with your own experiences. I would love to share them, anonymously of course unless you indicate otherwise, with others. Your successes and experiences can be their motivators, too!

I have decided to give up drinking soda pop -mainly caffeine soda's. It doesn't sound like a big deal to anyone who doesn't love it, like me. But my resolution was to not buy any for my house anymore. When we went to Costco with our coupon book we got to the pop aisle and my husband started to get a case (or 2) to put under our cart. I stopped him and told him that I wasn't buying it anymore. He asked why and I said that I didn't want to have it in the house anymore. Well, I work and I had already told myself that I would use this week as my last week of drinking at work. I have allowed myself 1 dollar for a drink a day. I can tell you that I have gone from 2-3 at home and 2 at least, at work per day to none at home and 1 at work. I get sluggish in the afternoon and crave a pop - but I haven't given in and eat a yogurt each day at that time instead. I have gone from bad head-aches to light heads and I hope to none from my withdrawal. I really don't like something controlling me. I may have a drink when I am out, but plan on getting root beer or something that has no caffeine. I am excited to do this. This is my new habit - not drinking pop.

Sandy Powell, January 2010

First Week of January 2006 - For a Better 2006, Set Up A Family Calendar Now!

Do you want things to be more organized, less rushed, and with fewer glitches this next year? Whether there are just two of you, or you are working with a family of a larger size, prepare and use a family calendar to have better days all during 2005.

A well-used wall calendar is an organized family’s best friend. It is a tool which must be prepared diligently at the first of the year, updated each month, reviewed each week, then looked at each and every day to do its best job.

Twelve-month wall calendars are usually available at office supplies stores for a modest price. Purchase one now to get a head start on the new year.

Label the calendar right away with the known events for the next year. This might include business trips, birthdays, holidays, children’s school schedules, family reunions, and potential family vacation dates. Colorful marking pens can be used to emphasize important dates. Draw red hearts on Valentine's Day, balloons on birthdays, and stars on national holidays.

Any time you receive an invitation to an event (such as a wedding, shower, or birthday party), note the date, time, and details on the calendar. When the children's soccer schedule is brought home, take a minute and note times and dates as well. One family found that using stickers for regular, repetitive events was helpful in reminding them of their commitments. Blue stickers were put on Tuesdays for piano lessons, green stickers were used on Wednesday for football practice, and pink stickers were for Friday’s dance lessons. Even the youngest members of the family easily learned to associate the colored stickers with certain reoccurring activities.

At the beginning of each month, review the calendar and add additional notes to help your days go better. If Kevin's birthday is on the 15th, when will you take him birthday shopping? Note that date on the calendar. If you have a traditional family party on the 25th, when will you go to the specialty grocery store and purchase the supplies for that special dessert you always bring? Also note this date on the calendar.

At the beginning of each week, hold a family council with everyone in your family at which time you review the events for the upcoming week, learn about school assignments, projects, and tests (such as the term spelling test on Friday), coordinate rides to and from the varied activities, plan the preparation for festivities (such as cookies for the back-to-school night), and get babysitting commitments from your teenagers (so you and your spouse can have a date night out).

This wall calendar is for your whole family's use and should be kept near the kitchen table. At the beginning of the evening meal, quickly review what tomorrow will bring and remind family members of their commitments and responsibilities. For instance, "George, tomorrow I will be picking you up right after school to take you to piano lessons." "Mary, brownies need to be baked for that party tomorrow. I can help you get them ready after dinner". "Frank, when shall we fill up with gas for the weekend drive to the wedding up north?"

Over and over again, the family wall calendar can act as a prompter to help activities run smoothly and lessen the stress which often accompanies a busy family’s life. Purchase and fix it up at the beginning of the year, review and make detailed plans at the beginning of the month, have a family council and coordinate activities at the beginning of the week, and go over the calendar at dinner time. You will notice an immediate and lasting improvement in your family’s lifestyle!