Weekly Hints - 2008

September 3, 2008 Topical Filing System

I recently received the following request:

Could you share your method for organizing all the printed 'thoughts' that religious women collect?  I did a 'sort to the floor' (which is put everything on the floor, make piles, sort, toss, shred, etc. just this week - much overdue!) and now am faced (again) with how to file and organize every tidbit from adversity, atonement, women’s organization to Zion, and everything in between!

My old file system worked for 25+ years, but...I guess I need to revisit the process.

Shall I just move to an A-Z format, 26 pendaflex hanging files, and put all the "A's" in one hanging file (adversity, attitude, atonement), or just what do you suggest?!

Thanks in advance for your tips!

Lisa in UT

This is my best method for filing anything topically:

1)       I have manila file folders, labeled A-Z, one letter per folder. 

2)       I have pendaflex file folders, labeled A-Z, one letter per folder.

3)       I have a box of 1” x 3.5” white labels to facilitate re-labeling (when I misspell, change my  mind, or need to redo a label).

4)       I have a container(s) for holding my files.

5)       I put the appropriate manila file folder in the same lettered pendaflex file folder in my container.

          This allows me to remove any manila file folder, go through my materials, and return it to the appropriate place in my pendaflex folders easily.

6)       I sort through the paperwork (in this case religious materials), purging unnecessary, awkward, and irrelevant material.

7)       I put the “want to save for possible Church needs” paperwork topically into the right folder.  An article on the Atonement in the “A” folder, the cute story about babies under “B”, and the doctrinal article about Christ under “C”. 

          IMPORTANT:  As I file each article, I write the chosen topic name in the upper right corner.  This facilitate refiling the article.

8)       When an article deals with two topics, say Christ’s Atonement and the Resurrection, I file it in the most likely file for retrieval (in this case “R” for Resurrection) and put an 8.5” x 11” sheet of cardstock (or 8.5” x 11” sheet of paper, if you prefer) in the “C” folder with the label:  Christ’s Atonement and Resurrection – see “R”.

9)       When I find that I have numerous articles about the same subject which tend to overwhelm one file folder, I will label a separate manila folder for that topic, say “Charity”, and a separate pendaflex folder labeled “C-Charity” which is then filed behind the “C” pendaflex folder.

          This allows my filing system to expand and contract easily with use and need. 

10)     I put paperwork regarding a Church position in this filing system in the same way.  Obsolete secretarial paperwork, for instance, goes in a manila folder labeled “Secretary – 2000”.  This manila folder goes into a pendaflex folder labeled “S – Secretary”.

I hope this system works for you, too.  Buy your supplies, keep it simple, don’t save too much of anything, and finish up the project ASAP so you can start using your files instead of looking at your piles.  Happy filing!

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

August 27, 2008  Prepared Before

Sometimes others seem to need us most when we are least prepared to reach out.  It happened to me this weekend.  I have had several major commitments the last several weeks and then last Saturday a good friend died in an untimely manner much too soon for her young life’s energy and the needs of her yet maturing family.

I was caught somewhat unprepared.  There was little immediately at hand to take along when we visited the mourning grandparents and orphaned children.  My personal sharing reserves were depleted, the need was “now”, and there was no additional time or energy to prepare after the fact.  Oh, may I encourage all of us, because life’s stewardships shift and bulge at different times in unexpected ways and because difficult challenges come when we might least expect them, to apply or reapply the “prepared before” principle more thoroughly in our lives.  Those we love and know will always have an unexpected reason to celebrate, their birthdays come around much too fast each year, they marry, have children, and sometimes they mourn.  How am I going to be more “prepared before” so I can participate, share, and contribute even in the midst of other pressing needs?

I believe the answer has been and always will be in getting ready (often in bulk) to share a personalized gift, send a condolence card with a small remembrance, have a meal to unfreeze, heat and deliver, or pickup something near at hand to bring along when a visit is in order.  “Very soon” is a good time for this focus, these preparations, and possibly a purchase or two.  As soon as we find ourselves with a little breathing room, let’s sit down and “prepare before.”

Let’s go shopping to acquire, wrap what needs wrapping, stock up on what needs to be multiplied to refill our cupboards, and prepare what needs to be frozen so we can share, love, mourn, and support when the time is ripe.

For me this means baking a second batch of cookies to freeze the next time I’m in the kitchen, adding an additional stop to my errands list and purchasing some appropriate items to have on hand.  It means a wrapping session when I’m on the phone with someone who has much to say, and arranging a few silk flowers in my extra, empty vases.  It means getting stocked up, again, on emotional preparation, the kind that can give expressive support, emphatic care, and encouraging sustenance to those in need.

So many times others have come quickly and easily to my aid.  I want to be ready to serve in the same way.  So together, let’s get “prepared before”!

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

August 6, 2008 Safely Organized

          Walking home from an errand this evening I happened upon a young toddler standing of the edge of a very busy street oblivious to the obvious dangers whooshing past.  It startled me so I crossed the road, took his eager hand, and walked him back to the open front door of his home (which happened to behind and to the side of dense front yard foliage).  His mother, new to our neighborhood and distracted with moving in, babe in arms and another child at her side, was grateful but confused.  How had the safety of her little family been so completely and so quickly traumatized without much noise and with little warning?

          Another time, a good friend told me the chemicals under her kitchen sink were quite safe from her two young girls because she was always “around” and would get to the situation before any “real” harm could be done.  No so, not quite so.

          So this week, actually this morning, would you walk around your home and look for ways to organized the dangers therein so they are minimized and/or removed?  My new neighborhood friend needs a high hook on her screen door to keep eager children from wandering during her distractions.  My second friend needs her chemicals up and out of reach. Just in case.  Just in case.

Right now you and I probably have a can here, a bottle there, and some other dangers that are too low or too near.  These things need moving, changing, and reorganizing to keep our worlds safe and sound.

          Look around, under, down, and through very soon.  Safely organizing before a disaster is always easier than cleaning up and crying after one.

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

July 30, 2008 Finishing Summer

Because summer seems to end too soon and school descends before we are quite ready, many of our lives are in “overlap” during August.  We don’t really want to “finish” summer because the days are still hot and yet the requirements of clothing, school supplies, and homework are right before us.  How do we handle this overlap period and gain the cooperation of our family members to help with the putting away of one season even as we prepare for the next one?  May I suggest taking just a few minutes this week and making an “overlap” list?

Yes, fold a piece of paper in half lengthwise and write “Finish Up Summer” as the heading on the left side and “Begin School” on the right side.  Then list on the left side the items which need attention to complete your summer activities and list on the right side items needing your attention to get ready for school/autumn.  Maybe put the list on your fridge and add to it as you remember other items.  This will also bring it to the attention of your family members and possibly you can elicit their cooperation and help. 

I know that some of you don’t have school beginning or are maybe on a year-round school schedule, but even then finishing up summer and beginning fall will “happen” next month which means we must be thinking about it this week if we are to stay organized.

My own “finish summer” list would include three times for harvesting and freezing vegetables from my garden, having another evening picnic in the canyon, and altering three skirts for September’s needs.

My “start school” list will include purchasing Spanish tapes (as I want to learn that language during the upcoming winter months), buying warm socks, and taking advantage of the school supply sales as I’m low on binders, pencils, and glue.

Thinking now, making a written list, and then transferring these goals to your regular routines during August will make the “overlap” season happen with greater ease.  Good luck, my friends.  The long, hot days will be waning soon.  It will be sad to say goodbye to a good summer, but we’ll be glad to be ahead of the game (at least in theory) as we approach a new scholarly season.

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

July 23, 2008 School Clothes Inventory

I’m sure you don’t want to hear it, but for many school districts in my area (and maybe in yours, too), school will begin in about one month from now.  Ouch!  Where did the summer go and do we need to think of school already?

Yes, I would propose it is time to do a school clothing inventory, figure out what clothes you have on hand, what you can use for this year’s needs, and what you will need to purchase to fill out each child or teenager’s wardrobe?

A simple School Clothing Inventory form will help expedite this process, keep the budget in tow, and help you along the way.  This form is also useful for those of you who have grown children but would like to update and improve upon your own or husband’s working wardrobe.  What do you have?  What works?  What needs to be added?  How much do you have to spend?

Remember, all projects, especially a big one like this, are best done in small steps.  First, we will take an inventory.  That will take a bit of time (with everything else that needs doing).  Then soon afterwards, we will begin shopping with our printed inventories (which will then act as our lists).  Finally, we will mend, alter, and otherwise label the items so they will have a chance to be used for the whole of next year (layering for seasonal weather needs).

One word of caution.  Some children and teenagers seem to grow the most between when you shop for pants and they begin school.  Buy big at the waist and long at the leg to allow for this spurt of growth. 

So, my friends, with all else that is on your mind, get out enough boxes for each of your family members and label them:  School clothes for ___.  This can act as you initial stash as you sort, find, and make decisions.

Out of season clothes that useful but not needed right now (meaning that they are the size between two children) should be stashed in additional, labeled boxes or containers.  My favorite labeling system is:  Boys-1 pants, Boys-2 shirts, Girls-1 pants, Girls-1 tops, Girls-1 skirts/dresses, etc. for all ages.

Let’s get going!  School is starting up again too soon this year unless we get a head start on our preparations!

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

July 14, 2008 Weeding Again

          When I went away last weekend, I could hear the weeds in my yard giggling as I drove off.  You see, I have also been “absent” from my yard for a few days a couple of weeks ago and they got ahead of me.  I did a three-hour, total yard marathon weeding just before this last trip, but couldn’t weed deeply or thoroughly.  I mostly got the “big” ones that were showing their flowers and throwing their seeds.  As has happened before, the weeds got ahead of me this year.  One week’s distraction and they seem to take over.

Isn’t it the same with the personal weeds in our life.  Take care of it while it is small and its done and gone.  Let it grow a bit, even water it accidentally, forget to hoe it out, and you have a mess of dandelions to deal with for a lot of tomorrows.

          The child who is sassy and we are too tired to have a short, crucial discussion about appropriate language soon is sassing and like a weed encouraging the rest of the family to follow.  The teenager who is disobedient and we are at a loss of how to train and teach soon abandons all responsibilities and feeds off others.  The friendship that is frayed to almost gone and we are too distracted to pay much attention soon is seeding discontent, dissension, and eventual abandonment.  Oh, how important are the weeds of our lives.

          The bedroom that becomes slightly messy seems to sprout more untidiness even as we sleep.  The dishes undone from just one day grow and fester in our kitchen to create chaos and frustration.  The grocery shopping that doesn’t get done, the laundry that sits, the bills that remain unpaid all are “giggling” at their power in our lives.  Weeds again. 

          May I encourage you this week, as you go about your daily routines, to choose one “weed” in your life over which you would like to take total control.  Are there dandelions of defeat in your dirty clothes, morning glory of bills waiting your attention, or thistles of disobedient children who need to be reigned in and disciplined?  It is a mess in your storage room, a smell in your refrigerator, or a stack of papers in your home office?  Where are the weeds you need to hoe?

          Let’s choose one unwanted plant, have a “marathon” hoeing hour and get ahead.  Then we can more easily keep up with our weeds while they are still small and easily discarded, dealt with, and otherwise controlled.  Happy weeding!

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.

July 9, 2008 Pesky Neighborhood Kids

What’s to be done when summertime family routines have been exploded by the invasion of pesky neighborhood kids?  These are NOT the children that ring the doorbell before entering your home, ask before opening the frig, and go home politely when dismissed for lunch.  We are talking about those children who are more likely to have boisterous conduct, unruly behavior, and personalities that grate against the grain.  If this is a problem you are facing, immediately set some definitive parameters to meet your needs.  There are several ways to approach this challenge.

1)  Set New Rules.  Children tend to repeat what you say and so it’s better not to declare, “This is a big problem for me and I don’t like having so many pesky kids around.”  Put a positive spin on it and suggest, “We are going to initiate a new plan to better enjoy our summertime friends.  Here are several new rules which will make things better for our family.” 

2)  Open Door Policy.  It works very well to have friends share time your children, but only after a set time every day.  Decide when to begin your “open door policy.”  This might be as late as 10-11 a.m. if your children have housework to finish, dishes to do, the piano to practice, and summer homework to complete.  If neighborhood kids call, teach your children to say, “Our family doesn’t have friends over until after 11 a.m.  I’ll ask if you can come over then.”

3)  Can’t Play Sign.  Sometimes, an additional “Can’t Play” sign can be posted on the front door to alleviate having to answer the door over and over again.  Consider hanging this sign on your Christmas wreath holder to keep it up and away from eager fingers.  Of course, the first few times you will have to respond to the doorbell and explain that when this sign in on the door, it means please don’t ring the doorbell as there are no exceptions!

4)  One Friend Policy.  If you have a large family or have a short capacity for noise, it proves helpful to let each child in your family have one friend over at a time.  Children can also inform friends at the beginning of the visit how long they will be able to play.  This keeps parameters on an otherwise challenging state of affairs.

5)  Please Ask Permission.  As with the previous situations, rules should be established about behavior.  It seems reasonable to have all neighborhood children use the doorbell and ask to come in the first time they enter home.  Your children should ask permission to let them play.  All children should seek consent to get food from the pantry or frig.  Lastly, your children should ask to leave home and go elsewhere.

6)  Quiet Time.  Have a certain part of each day that is set aside for “quiet” time.  This siesta, usually one-two hours after lunch, is when your children are left to themselves to do quiet activities in their bedrooms such as reading or playing with their toys.  This quiet time allows you to do something alone, too.  There should be no friends, no interruptions, and no phone calls.  The house is kept relatively quiet!  This provides a respite from the hectic infighting and traumatic interplay that is so much a part of living on top of each other during long summer days.

When the “siesta” is done, back come the friends, out go the kids for a splash through the sprinklers, and up comes Mom to return to her home management duties.  Everyone is refreshed and ready to finish out the day.  Try it before you laugh.  It really works!

7)  Don’t Be the Local Restaurant.  Gently shoo all friends from your home before you begin preparations for meals unless previous commitments have been made.  This keeps the food budget down and your personal routines more in control.  If you desire to have an occasional friends’ picnic, invite children to come on a certain day and time to share a meal with your family. 

8)  Did You Know?  Set this plan in place by informing every child that comes into the home during the next week (when they first arrive) of your new plan.  “Did you know we have some new rules?”  This avoids later embarrassment when you have to tell them to “its time to leave” or enforce rules when they eat your food without permission.

Friends for your children are such an important part of summertime fun.  But always, yes always, it is also good to have parameters that limit and restrain so everyone feels in control, there is some quiet time each day, and the standards of your home are honored.  Good luck and happy friendshipping!

Find more helpful ideas in my House of Order Handbook.